Hi darling, you must be wondering about all those what ifs again. What if I texted hi? What if I watched his day of Facebook? What if I said hello to him as you glanced down from the rooftop? You have all these what ifs but you’re still stuck in that phase without knowing the real deal between you and him.
So how do we get out unscathed? The thing is, you can never go out without getting bruises along the way. Your heart will bleed, your eyes will tear and your soul will wallow. It will always be like that, and honey, believe me, its not only you that’s hurting, he is too.
But here are some ways that you can get out broken, bruised and weak but still alive and kicking.
One. You stop.
You stop believing that there is more than what meets the eye. You stop giving meaning to all his non-verbals and mixed messages. You stop hoping that there will be the day that he’ll love you just the same way as you do.
Two. You run.
You run from places where you know he’ll be. You run to your friends to keep your bruised heart company. You run towards the light of realizing that you deserve better than what he is willing to give. You run from the feelings you start having for him.
Three. You hide.
You hide your hearts deepest desires. You hide your thoughts behind tweets. You hide your smiles behind your palms or the twinkle in your eyes behind the sunnies. You hide from the truth that the feelings that you have for him will always be there but you will never act upon it.
Four. You cry.
You cry your heart out. You cry until you feel your tears dry up. You cry until all the hurt is out of your heart and you’ll be ready to love again. Because the tears will dry and your heart will heal.
Five. You smile.
You smile at all the memories you have with him, the time when you danced under the rain, or that time when he complimented your cooking. You smile with all the love you have left and the you’ll laugh.
Six. You laugh.
You laugh at all those times he made silly jokes. You laugh at his flaws as he laugh at yours. You laugh all the pain away as you slowly realize that even though he makes you happy, he no longer deserves to be your happy pill.
Seven. You love.
You love the way everything shines with deeper hues. You love how the kids play and the adults work. You start to love the world around you and then you love you.
You love the way you stop, run, hide, cry, smile and laugh with all the things that happened around you.
You love and therefore you will be loved.
Stay strong darling, you are worth more than the heartache you’re feeling right now.