First of all, I am extremely sorry. I’m sorry that you had to grow up in extraordinarily muddled times. I am sorry that the transition was more prominent than ever as you hit puberty.
I am sorry that your parents, teachers, and elders, who were supposed to guide you, were equally dazed, overwhelmed, and intimidated by the challenges the new era presented, and I am extremely sorry that you had to figure out most of what you know about the world on your own.
There should have been a real role-model: someone who knew the right from the wrong, someone who had perspective, intuition, conviction, and tactfulness to inspire you, someone who was in control. I am sorry you had no one to figure it all out for you.
I know your first disappointment came when you found out that your teachers didn’t have all the answers. I know you were at unease when you discovered that adults are not always gentle, kind, and right.
They are often hypocritical and pretentious, they lie, they hurt each other, and they don’t always have ‘making the world a better place’ as a priority in life.
I know they taught you one thing and did another, I know you were often in disagreement when they said what they were doing was best for you, and I am equally aware that they often didn’t have any concrete solutions/answers to your problems/complaints.
I am sorry they were so bogged down by their humanity that they gave up on the hope of rising above the mundane, gave up on their dreams far too easily and expected you too to toe the boundaries set up by the society.
I know sometimes you find yourself ill-equipped to deal with this world, and you partly blame your upbringing, your education, lack of certain things/people in your life, and your destiny.
It’s not that your life is totally haywire, and you are doing badly for yourself. On the contrary, you strive to be a better person, to undo the mistakes made in the past, to form good habits, and to give meaning to your life.
You have the right intention, and maybe all you need is a dash of understanding; an ounce of direction and a bit of encouragement from someone you respect and value highly, someone you see has got what it takes to float above the clouds of chaos.
You could go places, only if you had the map.
Here’s the good news. You are born with the map. The only challenge in the life is to be able to figure out sooner than later that you have the map, and to have a firm belief in your map.
Rest is easy. Rest falls in place. And how do you know that you’ve found the map? It too is simple. You know you have the map when:
- You can see your life objectively.
- You are able to trust at least one person in life completely.
- You spend time re-evaluating your statements and your actions.
- You are able to make sacrifices.
- You are able to accept that you make mistakes.
- You are able to feel guilty when you hurt someone.
- You are able to forgive sincerely, others and yourself.
- You realize that life gets difficult for everyone.
- You pay sincere compliments to people sometimes.
- You have goals, even if it is making to work on time.
- Sometimes you fail to be nice, but you try again, and you know you will have to keep trying.
Once you trust your map, the map will not only make your present and future clear, it will redeem your past also as you will be more conscious of the flailing nature of human understanding.
You will be able to forgive people in your past as you see them under the light of their humanity and you will expect your successors to do the same for you.
Once the understanding that it’s an imperfect world that stays put because of the efforts we make toward perfection sets in, you will see the world with the awe of a newborn and develop natural comprehension of your role in it.
Until then, keep trying to find your map.