Catching The Drift: When A Relationship Harbors A ‘Drifter’

Lola Versus
Lola Versus

You catch me by surprise. I’m delighted, yet hesitant, on your persistence and your steadfast efforts to capture me. I’m not used to this but I give in, because I like you too.

I hear from you every day. It’s like clockwork really, as you remind me of the rising and setting sun. When you rise I rise with you when you fall I fall with you too. We laugh, we joke and giggle endlessly. Everything you say to me is enchanting. 

I tell my closest friends about you, of course, and they eagerly await the day they can meet for themselves, this majestic person. I do not worry though, because I know they like you already, for you make me a happier being. 

Time will pass, and we will start to venture into unchartered territory…we’re blind, but we navigate with a sense of ease… But then comes the day where you grow silent. It’s something new, something I’m not used to, because we communicate. We get each other, we’re on the same page and we just know. I was so sure you wouldn’t be like the others, but here I am, and the sun has risen and it has fallen, and I have yet to know anything of you today. I wonder if you are alright and if you might need help. I’ll wait to hear from you though, and eventually I do. I am relieved and temporarily satisfied until you disappear again. The sun rises and it falls and I rise again, confused and capsized. 

Your communication grows sparse and fades with time, and I am left deliberating if there was something I could have done to save this. I am left bewildered, left to try and conjure up some excuse for your Houdini act. I want to ask, I want to know why, but I stay silent and I move forward. 

At first you’re always on my mind, and I feel let down, a little self conscious and weepy. I wonder if you are by a beach in the sun and are thinking of me… I wonder if you hear my favorite song and assume I’m doing just fine. I wonder if you think you made the right choice, if maybe you found something you thought was “better”.

I’ll be fine… actually, I’ll be more than fine. I will be stronger and I will move on. I will remember you, sure, and I will smile. You are silly for what you’ve done but you are not wrong. You are not meant for me just as I am not meant for you. We will find our own truths and meaning in this life, and we will find our love too. 

I will not be mad at you, I will just wish you had spoken up… It’s just that I’m really not one for magic tricks. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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