1. Forgive even if they do not deserve it.
It is okay to feel. It is okay to feel bad, feel good, feel thankful, and even feel angry; but, along with all these feelings, you have to forgive others even if they feel sorry about themselves. Stop blaming yourself for the things and people you cannot handle. The best way to free yourself from burden and guilt is to forgive. Stop the pressure. Breathe. It is the best way to free yourself.
2. Enjoy yourself.
When there is a chance, always take the “me time.” Being alone does not mean you are a friendless person. In fact, it is an act giving yourself to meditate, and to grow. This is the perfect time to think about yourself—your life. This is a moment when you can talk to yourself, and try to figure out who you truly are when nobody is around.
3. Do not just love your body. Take care of it.
It is true that you should love yourself—from your skin tone to every inch of your waist, but you should also take care of it. Loving your body does not only mean embracing the whole you, you should take good care of it. Drink a lot of water. Sleep on time. Never skip your meals. Loving your body does not only mean owning it. It is all about keeping it healthy, and happy.
4. Being jealous of others will not make your life beautiful.
Other people’s success is not the absence of your success in the future. As much as you wonder how other people with the same age as yours could do many things, so do you! The most important thing here is to look at them as your inspiration not to stop trying, and chasing your dreams.
5. Abandon toxicity.
Choose your friends. Do not allow others to treat you as if you are a trash just because you have been friends with them for a long long time. It is not your job to undermine your feelings just for a toxic friend. It might be true that your friend is having a hard time understanding himself, or herself, but remember that you are a human too. You have a heart to take care. You have feelings to mind. Stop feeding shallow people. If the ready-to-lean-on-shoulders are not enough, maybe you want to consider teaching your friend to know the importance of other people’s value.
6. Saying “no” is not a bad thing.
Stop going with pressure. If your friends ask you to do something that is not in to you, always say no. You have to understand that you have to respect yourself first so other people will respect you. If you worry about acceptance and friends? Remember that your self- acceptance is much more important than other peoples’ views about you. Real friends will accept who you are, and will respect you, and they will not put you to harm.
7. Mind your parents.
As much as we are busy growing up, and finding ourselves, our parents are also busy growing old. The generation gap is problematic when it comes to understanding points of view; but always know that in explaining your thoughts, you should always think of their feelings. Older people tend to be more sensitive as they get older. Things might be blurry but they just want what is the best for us.
8. Do not hesitate to ask for an advice.
At this age, there is a whisper on your heart that you can do it all alone, and stop asking an advice from other people. It must be clear that seeking an advice is different from dictatorship. We must not allow our feelings to eat us. Sometimes our emotions are coming too close on our ways; and as a result, we tend to forget looking at the bigger picture.
9. Not everyone will like you, and it is okay.
Just as wearing the trendy nude lip color, not every girls like wearing that shade of lipstick. This is the same way of pleasing everybody. Looking in the eye of a short term, pleasing everyone is much easier than showing the real you; but when it comes for a longer time, pleasing everybody will be your own toxic for yourself. Drop their opinions. They will not define you. Go find yourself. Accept yourself. You are already beautiful before anyone else saw you. Do things for you, not for them.
10. Chase your dreams.
Always fight for what you love. Forget all the doubts. Forget what they say—whether that career is something that will not give you bread and butter, always find your niche. Get the course you really want to. Do the job you were always dreaming of. Life is too short for all of your what ifs. If you fail, go and keep trying. If you decided to change your career, go pursue it. Do not let anything to stop you from achieving your dreams. If things might be a little complicated, change your reaction. Do not lose hope. You can pull yourself up. Little by little.
11. Know your value.
Stop settling for the relationships where you are unhappy, and undervalued. Cliché as it could be, you deserve the love you give to other people. If you know you’re right, go, fight for yourself. Never abandon yourself because of your fears. Anxiety will always be there, but always know how to fight your demons. You got this life.
12. Practice self-love.
Self-love is not limited through living a healthy life, but it is also about loving and accepting yourself. Loving yourself in the sense that you do not put yourself to harm just to fit in with other people’s standards. Self-love is allowing yourself to grow. Self-love is seeking peace, and fulfillment in whatever you do as a person. Forgive others. Stop being guilty. Seek peace and meditation. Accept that things will not happen the way you want them to be. Forgive yourself.
13. Your love life will not define who you really are.
At this phase of our lives, this is the moment where our closest friends are finding their boyfriends or girlfriends. When you are at the mall and you bumped into your classmate way back when you were in high school, and she is with her boyfriend, it is okay to wonder, and feel jealous. It is normal. You can react. You are a human being. You have feelings to. However, the absence of a romantic partner is not the absence of your own beauty. You are beautiful. You are blessed enough to be surrounded by the people who really loves and accepts you.
14. Find thyself.
It is okay to get lost. Most of the time, you will find yourself in a state of existential crisis. Asking yourself if you know what you are doing, or are you choosing the right pat. Do not feel guilty of being confused—on who you are, what you are, and what you want to be. It is okay to copy other people’s styles, and perspectives. This is the only way you will know yourself. This is the only way you will figure out what person you want to be—what kind of person you really are.
15. Things will be muddy.
Life will certainly give you lemons every time it has a chance. It will never be perfect just as how you imagined it would be, but always remember that the bad times will not last. Days will be brighter more than how you thought. You cannot change the bad things that happen to you, but you can always change your reaction. Things might be bad, but always know that you yourself could make yourself better. Never allow those bad things to outweigh the good ones. The world is much better than we know.
We could have a life full of regrets, but there must be a spark of hope inside our hearts that there will a moment that we will gather all the bad things that happened in our lives, and then we will realize why things have to be that way.