5 Superhuman Traits You Get From Waitressing


1. Smooth talking.

When you approach a table, you aren’t just smacking down the specials, you’re creating a couture experience that should culminate in a nice little (large) tip at the end of the brief love affair. Are you my favorite people in the world sitting at my favorite table in the restaurant? Always, yes. Love the tie, I’m so glad you guys are back, the place has missed you. Are you sure you qualify for that Senior Citizen discount? I might need to see some ID, sir.

2. Acute reading of body language.

I see you looking for me on the first neck-turn, and here I come with a refill for your coffee because I just sensed you would be finished by now. Even though I have five other tables that need my attention, you’re the only one I’m really here to serve. The son’s getting dessert but the mom is weakly saying no? I’ll bring two forks, I see the desperation girl. Toe tapping? Here comes the check with my big smile.

3. Multi-tasking management.

There are drinks to get, appetizers to time right, napkins needing folding, dessert menus to pitch, glass to fill, beers to fetch, and all while you’re balancing heavy trays full of food that has to stay hot. The place would fall apart if you did all of these things one at a time. Your brain probably develops new pathways to deal with all the strands of info you have to remember (he’s allergic to shellfish, I’d like a different fork when you come back, could you bring more Ranch?) and you become the master of multi-tasking.

4. Killer calves and biceps.

Those trays. The back and forth. You’ve got steaks and burgers, fried fish and potatoes, and everyone got two sides with their meal. Nice choice, but man it is heavy when it comes out of the kitchen. Walking with that weight though will honestly make you stronger and every time someone is indecisive it just means you just get to take another lap. You’re a lean mean machine by the end of the shift, and you have your favorite customers to thank for that.

5. Empathy for your fellow servers.

You will never look at your waiters the same way again, and you most certainly won’t give a bad tip. Now that you’ve gone to the other side and seen the sweat that goes on in the kitchen and heard the joyous sound of the receipt printing, you understand what it is to hear someone request five alterations to a standard dinner item. You look at these beautiful creatures serving you with sympathy in your eyes and an “I feel you homegirl” in your heart. Waitressing toughens you up while at the same time making you a bit of a softie, and you’re grateful for the change. After all, without such a multi-dimensional personality you wouldn’t be able to relate to all your customers on so many different and personal levels. TC Mark

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