1. Keep your parents out of your relationship. Seriously. They have no place in it.
2. Keep your best friends/BFFs out of your relationship. It will not end well if you don’t.
3. Sometimes, the sexiest thing in the world for you two to do is spend the weekend inside, watching television in sweats…or not much clothing at all.
4. Have sex. Seriously. Screw each other regularly.
5. Have sex everywhere. Seriously. Screw at the movie theater, your friend’s house, in your car. Screw.
6. Love her tight, heart-shaped ass…and her tear gas level farts. Love his sculpted muscles…and his noxious morning breath. Love all of your Bae.
7. Let her watch that Lifetime Channel movie, and go watch the football game at a bar.
8. Let him watch the football game, and watch Queen Sugar on your tablet.
9. Arguments are common in relationships. Violent arguments are not.
10. She can have a crush on Channing Tatum. It’s fine.
11. Space is underrated in relationships. Give your partner space, even if unprompted. Despite the fact that you two are in a union, you are separate people who are sharing a life. Respect that fact.
12. Complete honesty is overrated. I don’t really want to know what you think about my comic book collection, and you don’t want to know what I really think about the music you stream.
13. She can have a crush on Ben Simmons. It’s fine.
14. Issues with finances can cripple a relationship. Issues with trust can harm a relationship. What will absolutely torpedo a relationship is an inability to compromise by either one of you.
15. Putting up with each other’s quirks may irritate you. Going to a birthday party for your partner’s five times removed cousin’s half-brother blows. And you will still have to do it. Take a shower, roll up your sleeves, jump in the car, and go meet Cletus. Yes, the party will suck, and Cletus will be a goober… but, no one said love would be easy.