You Get Treated Like Sh*t Because You Allow Yourself To Get Treated Like Sh*t

Well, isn’t that a damn shame?

I’m not accusing you of willingly subjecting yourself to being treated like shit in relationships, but I am accusing you of letting yourself continuously be treated like shit.

Why stay if you are consistently being let down by someone who is supposed to make your life happier and somewhat easier?

Some people are smart. They see how their significant other doesn’t live up to their standards or they see how they are more sad than happy in a relationship, and they leave.

Woah, leave? Yes, I understand this is a concept some people just cannot grasp.

“I get talked down to.”

“I get called derogatory names.”

“He doesn’t take me out anymore. Ever.”

“She flirts with other guys every time we go out.”

“Wait. You want me to leave? Why? I love him/her!”

NEWS FLASH. Love isn’t enough. Not now. Not ever.

Not even in those pretty fairy tales we heard as children.

There’s more to true love than just love. All the heroes and protagonists of fairy tales taught us that you have to fight for what (or who) you want. Whether it’s evil stepmothers, dragons, or wizard queens with dark magic.

Okay, I’m pretty sure no one IRL has ever had to fight those things to gain or stay with a loved one, but they did still have to fight somehow. If you’re in a relationship, don’t ever say, “I’m a lover, not a fighter.” Because you have to be a fighter to be the proper lover. Love doesn’t come easy, so I’ll be damned if you’re telling me you never had to fight to stay.

Sure, love is the catalyst for a lot of things. Love leads to great stuff. Love can make a cheater change his ways. Love could turn a hoe into a housewife. Love is a mysterious force that can change a crappy situation into an amazing one.

Love can bring people together, but it doesn’t keep people together. Just because a person loves you or you love a person, doesn’t mean he/she is doing anything good or beneficial for you.

I’m going to say something that I feel a lot of people don’t realize. Good intentions don’t always correlate to good actions. Your boyfriend or girlfriend could love more than life itself, but that doesn’t always mean he/she is going to treat you like you’re his/her everything.

So if you ever look at your life one day and think to yourself, “This isn’t what I dreamt for myself. He/she is not what I expected. I could be happier elsewhere or with someone else,” do yourself a favor, and leave.

I know, I know. Break ups can really do some hardcore damage. Your heart can get shattered into tiny pieces, and some pieces you won’t be able to find because the person you love(d) will forever keep some. But what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. I firmly believe that. Also, the pain of the breakup will probably hurt less than staying in an unhealthy relationship.

I know, I know. Getting back onto that dating horse can be a scary ride. But if you think you deserve better… Why not get back on? You deserve it, especially if the last relationship you were in left you feeling like you weren’t good enough to be treated decently and properly. Find someone who treats you how Kanye treats Kanye.

Once again, love isn’t enough.

Love does not and cannot create a perfect relationship. But what does? Compromise, respect for one another, trust, honesty, good communication. Those are a few of the components that make up love. And not just any love. The good kind of love. The one where you’re excited to see your partner. The one where he/she inspires you to be the best possible version of yourself. The one worth working for.

If you feel your relationship is lacking in some of these areas, feel free to address the issue and work on it. But if your partner is stubborn and refuses to compromise or change, you have a problem. Don’t let yourself get walked all over. Don’t let yourself love hard and get nothing in return. Don’t let yourself get treated like shit.

If your significant other won’t love you right, I swear to the higher powers, there is someone else who can and will love you in ways you can’t even imagine.

Love yourself enough to know when it’s time to walk away. If you’re giving someone 100% of yourself, don’t let him/her get away with only giving you 50%. TC mark

Related

More From Thought Catalog