1. They don’t introduce you to their roommates.
When they invite you over to their place, regardless of whether they are living with roommates or family, they simply rush you past everyone else in the house without taking a moment to introduce you to them. They don’t care to introduce you because everyone already knows that you are temporary. Even the dog.
2. They are suspiciously interested in your friends.
Have you noticed how they always manage to casually bring up your friend’s name in every conversation? Initially, it was cool that they were interested in your life and the people who you surround yourself with, but now the whole situation is starting to feel a little bit less about getting to know you and your A-team, and a lot more about getting to know that one specific person who isn’t you.
3. They ask you why you care.
The only reason someone has to question why you care about them or the situation between the two of you is that they don’t.
4. Their friends are too comfortable being disrespectful toward or about you.
If their friends are comfortable saying disrespectful, vulgar, or inappropriate things to them regarding you, it is a direct reflection of how the person you are with feels about you. If your significant other respected you, their friends would as well, by association. Their friends would be more conscientious of how they talk about you to them.
5. They don’t correct their friends for being disrespectful toward or about you.
While your significant other can’t always control the way their friends act or the things they say about you, they can control the way that they react to their friend’s behavior. If your special someone finds humor in the vulgar things that their friends say about you, rather than correcting them, they don’t care about you as much as they may have lead you to believe.
6. When you try to address your discomfort in the way that their friends talk about you, they try to downplay it.
“That’s just the way we talk.”
“We’re just joking.”
“Sorry you overreacted, but that’s just how we are.”
Rather than validating your discomfort and correcting the problem with their friends, they make you out to be the one who is wrong for having expectations of basic respect from both them and their supposed friends.
7. They don’t take your insecurities or concerns into consideration.
When you attempt to communicate with them about the things they do that make you uncomfortable, they automatically get defensive and refuse to validate that you are feeling uncomfortable as a result of their actions. They make no attempt to correct any of the issues that you brought to their attention. Their own comfort zone and habits are more important to them than your comfort or relationship is.
8. They barely wait for you to get out of the car and shut the door, let alone get up the driveway or in your house before driving off.
If they drive away while you’re still stumbling through the snow to get to the back door, they don’t care about you. If their lives are so incredibly busy that they can’t stay for 20 seconds to ensure your safety, you probably shouldn’t waste any more of your own time on them.
9. They don’t hug when they say goodbye.
Honestly, if they don’t at least attempt to hug you goodbye, it’s probably for the best. It’ll just make letting go of them and walking away that much easier.