The Things I Wish You Knew

I wish you knew how much it kills me to know that we may never be together.

I wish you knew how much I truly love you.

I wish you knew that when I say “I would do anything for you,” that I mean it.

But you are lost in this world, just like I am. I crave your affection when you rarely show it. It hurts me to be next to you when all I want is all of you. You have given me glimpses of you, like someone peering in through the windows of your life. You’ve held me close when I needed someone and I can’t get those memories out of my head.

You have a beautiful soul that I adore every aspect of. But you can’t see past your selfish ways. I’ve done everything I can to make you love me as much as I love you. But now I’m realizing that I may not be what you want. I think you love the idea of me but not actually me.

I’ve tried so hard to walk away from you. But something inside me tells me to “stay.” Ultimately I am hurting myself.

I wish you knew that the women in my bed are not you. Even if I desperately wish they were you. But I can only fill the void of you with meaningless lovers.

I wish you knew that I have to let you go.

I wish you knew that we could have been something wonderful.

I wish you knew that you will always be my “what if.”

I wish you knew that I’ll always cherish the intimacy that we shared, even if I was just an experience.

I wish you knew that you made me appreciate sunsets.

You need to know that I’ll always love you, even if you will never love me to that capacity.