I’m Sorry I Gave Up On You To Save Myself

Tanja Heffner

I told myself that I will not write about you nor to you anymore but here I am still finding myself in the
Same spot spilling all the words I would like to say putting my thoughts into reality
I’m sorry but I will keep continue writing about you until I don’t feel the pain anymore
I still remember how we started talking and how your gaze has given me butterflies
I can still think about the times we were casually sitting on the couch wishing it would never last
I thought you were the best there is but I was wrong
Time passed by and you disappointing me doesn’t even surprised me anymore
Your excuses and reasons I nonchalantly forgiven not thinking about myself hurting
There were times that I want to give up on you but I tried not to
Seasons changed, I got used to your mixed signals that I don’t realized the difference if you love me or not
I was perplexed for what you say doesn’t match on how you act
One day I feel like I was the most important thing in the world
The next day it’s like I don’t exist anymore
Months went by, it’s even harder to see you now
But I was amazed how you can give your time to other people surrounding you but not I
Then it hit me that I was never in your priority
I keep talking about it yet it’s like no one is listening
You said that I was overdramatic and I was just overthinking
But I know myself more than you do, I know that love shouldn’t feel like this
And then it came, the day I thought it will never happen, things came to an end
I was waiting for you to try to stop me and fix things but there was nothing
I didn’t heard a single thing from you
It came to me how your half-hearted feelings for me was true
Because if you really did love me, then you wouldn’t do the things you do
You will keep bugging me to come back and asked for a second chance
I came to my senses and told myself that this is not what I deserved
Love, I’m sorry that I gave up on you to save myself. TC mark

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