10 Unromantic Things They’ll Only Do If They Truly Love You

big sick couple
The Big Sick

Humans thrive on communication, but it seems like our demise is the very same thing. Communication is hard. It goes beyond words most of the time and because the meaning behind intentions and actions is different for every person, we don’t always comprehend how much someone truly loves us based on that alone. It’s kind of like when your mom used to tell you to wear an extra layer on a cold day and you’d get annoyed at her nagging. She was nagging because she loves you and didn’t want for you to suffer in the cold. We all do this in relationships. We show our love by doing things that don’t always seem romantic. We show love in wordless ways because love is an action. If someone loves you, surely, they’ll do all of these.

1. Accept you.

When someone loves you, they accept everything about you. Your physical “flaws”, your kinks and quirks. All of you is accepted because when someone truly loves you they love all of you.

2. Call you out when you’re wrong.

With love comes honesty and if someone truly loves you, they’ll want to be honest about how they feel. When you’re wrong about something, they’ll call you out on it. They’ll do it to help you grow as a person and not in a judging tone. When someone you love calls you out on something, make sure you listen.

3. Support you.

They won’t crush your dreams, they’ll help you achieve them. A person who actually loves you is your number one cheerleader.

4. Understand you.

When you feel like no one understands you, they’ll make the effort to try to. They’ll hear you out, no matter how outlandish your feelings, dreams or ideas are.

5. Feel comfortable around you.

Pay close attention. If they can do silly, weird, or embarrassing shit around you, they love you.

6. Do things for you.

They’ll pick up your weird butt cream at the pharmacy, make you a tuna sandwich with a side of your favorite brand of pickles, do your laundry, scratch your back, etc. The list of mundane things someone who loves you is willing to do is endless.

7. Be transparent with you.

In every aspect, they feel the need to be real with you. No matter how much their voice shakes, the truth will always be present in your relationship.

8. Talk things out with you.

Arguments will happen, but they won’t throw the relationship away on a technicality. They are always willing to talk it out, like grownups.

9. Not manipulate you.

They won’t use affection, sex or tears to manipulate you. They don’t try to change you because they know that truly loving someone means taking just the way they are.

10. Feel secure in what you have.

They don’t go into jealous rages because they know what you have is special. They don’t smother you because they know that time apart just means the relationship will get stronger. They don’t object to you having friends, they don’t feel left out when you do your own thing, they encourage you to have a life outside of the relationship. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Fernanda is a native New Yorker who loves tea, fuzzy socks and stories

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