Go Slow With The Woman Who’s Been Abused

Vanessa Serpas

Don’t touch her.

She is afraid. Afraid of the slightest memory of what she’s been through. Her heart is painful, her spirit seems crushed. In her heart and mind are the carvings of pain and anger. Don’t touch her.

No, it has nothing to do with you.

With every kiss and hug, you feel the distance between you two. The spark is no longer there. Every kiss feels cold and awkward. It’s not you.

Of course she’s been through hell, she tries as much as possible to be normal but she can’t. The memories are too much for her. She simply cannot ignore them no matter how hard she tries. She always ends up breaking down and hating herself for being a woman, for being seen as an object of satisfaction, desire, nothing more.

What she needs more than ever is your understanding, love and care.

You are human and so is she. She also longs for your touch, she at times desires to give herself fully to you as much as you’d also want her. But then, she has to fight a battle she was never prepared for. A battle she never saw coming. Her thoughts always race back to how it all happened.

The battle is always too much for her to handle. She always has to give up at some point. But that doesn’t mean that you have to judge her.

That doesn’t mean that she doesn’t want to give herself to you.

She goes on her feet, with tears in her eyes. She feels worthless and undeserving. She begs for forgiveness. But then, it’s not her fault.

There are times she will be so much alive that she will forget about all her troubles; she will just want to live life. She will just want you to have the piece of her you have been missing. And again, she’ll go an extra mile just to make things up for you. But then again, she will remember, and the past will once more catch up with her. There are times she will want to be alone. Listen to her. Don’t push her.

She will always feel lucky for having someone like you love her through her worst. Loving her won’t be easy, but it will if you have the love and patience in you.

She’s fragile, but strong. She sees things differently now. She will be more guarded than ever. It’s hard for someone like her to get through her situation by herself. That’s why she counts on you, your love for her to help her through.

She will, at times feel disgusted when she looks at herself. Her piece of mind is no more. Remind her that she is amazing always. Remind her of how much you care. Let her know that she doesn’t have to be hard on herself.

Let your love and warmth unwrap her from her firmly built walls. Let your love be a light to both of you as she is a bit numbed by her pain. May you be her source of happiness so that she sees that there is a life worth to go back to. May you help her healing.

Just don’t look at her differently. In your eyes, let her always be one and the same.

Let her always be the woman you’ve always loved. TC mark

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