Finding And Letting Go Of True Love

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Carlos Domínguez / Unsplash

Life is a complex ongoing stream of struggles, easy wins, achievements, detours, and happiness beyond measure. It also gives you moments that change your life forever and it will happen in a blink of an eye, there will be no warning nor signs that will lead you to that moment. It just happens, and you stare and tears fall down your face. How does life lead you to this moment? As with every experience we have had, we enter it with the biggest determination and excitement. You walked back in my life as a surprise. Unbeknownst to us, we were at the same park with our own people and something triggered in you to reach out to me. With all desire and no reservation, I replied, jumped in and the rest was history.

From Wednesdays where I would leave work in a rush to get to your place so we can have our dinners to our weekend walks, our life started intertwining and my life started to shine. We get to meet each other’s friends, spent more days together, shared a deeper and more intimate connection and I started to think that I may just love this person. A little fearful but completely sure with what I felt, I said those three words one evening while I was on your lap. We were kissing and I pulled away, looked in your eyes, and said I love you. And you said I love you too. This is one of those moments. The one I was telling you about that will change your life forever.

Suddenly, it seemed like you can face it all and experience everything that life has to offer from a new and better standpoint, and life did feel like that. You shared life together, grew, experienced, and worked together towards the same goals and dreams. True love meant a bountiful well of love where every action is unconditional. Good or bad day, you’d still kiss them good night. Whether it was your fault or not, you’d still apologize to make things right. Together or not, you think about what you could do to make them happy. You cheer and support each other. Tired and stressed, you still want to take care of them. Their family is your family, and you build and nurture the bonds. With your true love, you’d build a home together and think you have the rest of your lives.

Sometimes however, it’s like what Meredith Grey says, “You never think the last time’s going to be the last time – you think there will be more. You think you have forever, but you don’t.” because life, again, with all its complexities and reasons, changes your life in the blink of an eye. Life throws us all sorts of unexpected things that help shape us, knock us down or lift us up. They say it all happens for a reason but when something so beautiful and bright reaches its end, you can’t help but shout “why?!” For whatever reason, your true love ends. Your future suddenly doesn’t look what you imagined it would be, your days are reduced to sleepless nights and crying bouts and your time is spent questioning and getting angry at life. Why did you meet someone good and learn to love if it will only end? What was the reason? What was the point? What did I learn? How do I pick up the broken pieces of me? How do I feel normal and happy again? Will the hurt and pain ever end? I don’t want to be forgotten, we exclaim hopelessly.

You see my friend, I don’t know either, not for sure at least, not right now. They say time heals all wounds; time also answers all our questions. Only time will unfold the reason. When the pain is felt completely, and you come to terms with what happened, you start picking up the pieces of you that shattered and start rebuilding it. You’ll mourn everything you lost and you’ll also celebrate what you had the pleasure of experiencing – a moment in time with a special person who made your life colorful and amazing once upon a time. Take comfort that it hurts right now because you truly loved someone and that you know just how brave and capable of love you are. Just because this love ends, doesn’t mean it wasn’t true. It was, it just isn’t with the right one. And now, you’re just another step closer to the right one where true love will surely bloom not only momentarily but for the rest of your life. TC mark

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