“I’m scared. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to trust again.”
She knows she wants to; she’s just completely frightened by the possibility that she’ll get hurt again, that she’s going to end up fighting alone. She knows deep inside she wants to risk being vulnerable and give in to what her heart is telling her to do. Little does she know that she’s somehow allowing her memories from the past manipulate the way she’s living her life; that she’s unknowingly becoming a prisoner of something that was never meant to last.
Learning how to get back out there is insanely difficult, almost impossible. She wonders if she’ll ever be able to find a love that is greater, stronger, worth more than the last. Every time she even thinks about it, her body weakens, she’ll start feeling a surge of anxiety crawling up, allowing her heart and mind to become restless.
1. Don’t fall in love with a girl who’s afraid to trust again if you have a problem with being patient.
It’s going to take her a lot of courage to get back up and convince herself
that it’s okay to love again as well as believe that what you have is real. Understand that picking up the broken pieces has become a habit of hers; that she will never get used to giving everything she has and gaining absolutely nothing from it.
2. Don’t give up on her just yet.
Know that she’s trying her best to become a better version of herself. Appreciate the effort she’s exerting to tidy up the mess. It’ll be worth it seeing her grow.
3. Don’t leave her thinking she’ll never be good enough.
That’s a lie she’ll end up considering truthful. She’s human, it is normal to commit mistakes. Putting all the blame on her doesn’t even come close to showing her you care.
4. Don’t make her feel like she’s competing for your time and attention.
It’s highly important to build trust; make her feel safe and comfortable in your presence. Remind her she’s the only girl you want; that you’re choosing her because you love her. She needs constant assurance.
5. Don’t say things you don’t mean.
She’s had enough heartbreaks to last a lifetime and you making her hold on to empty promises might leave her heart shattered for the rest of
her life. Nobody wants to hang on to false hope.
6. Don’t expect too much from her.
She’s in the process of finding herself for she has lost a part of her trying to love someone too much. Please give her time. Keep in mind that your efforts won’t always fix everything for her in a blink of an eye. Trying to make her
happy doesn’t give you the license to demand something from her in return.
7. Don’t pursue her if you’re unhappy and incomplete.
She can’t complete you. Work on yourself before getting into a relationship because you simple cannot give what you do not have. As the saying goes, “Don’t depend on other people as the source of your happiness or for approval.” (J. Meyer)
If you really love her, help her heal and realize that true love drives out fear.
Prove that love is both a verb and a choice you’re willing to make every single day. Many people know how to feel, but have no idea how to love. People often get confused by this which is why they get hurt easily. It’s hard for them to conclude that they took a wrong turn and committed a mistake which leads them to finding happiness in all the wrong places. They don’t allow themselves to grow and learn from their brokenness. They spend most of their time trying to find the perfect person, but then reality leaves them hopelessly believing that “perfect” doesn’t exist in this lifetime.
If you’re having a tough time trying to accept things, it’s okay. That’s normal. Allow yourself to feel, but don’t embrace the pain too much, you might end up getting attached to it. Cry if you feel the need to. Moving on is never about forgetting, nope. that’s not how it works. It’s about finding the strength to forgive not only the person, but more importantly yourself; live without holding grudges. Remind yourself that it’s not too late to start over.
Go ahead, enable yourself to break free from chains that hold you down!