This Is How We Put Ourselves Back Together
By Emma Tait
It starts with giving ourselves permission to fall apart
Let your pieces spin out and crash about like doors in a hurricane
Let yourself be heavy
Let yourself be open
Your exposed wounds will sting when you do this
And maybe everyone will see and that will sting too
They say everything happens for a reason but for now
Screw it
Let yourself admit you wish none of this had ever happened
Let yourself not know when or how its all going to get better
Let yourself be scared that it might not
Admit that things will never be the same but be fair
Admit that there are always two sides to the coin
Admit that when ‘this too shall pass’ comes
You might not be ready to.
They say get back out there
Get cleaned up
Get over it
But if it’s not time for that yet
It’s not time for that yet
So let yourself stay in
Let yourself stay sloppy
Let yourself stay under it
Give yourself permission to fall apart
Before you ever think about judging yourself for not being put back together
Once you do time will stop
Time will soften and the feeling of watching the days pass without trying to change yourself
Will no longer feel so sharp
Only then will it feel safe to open your eyes
Open your eyes and look at all the ways that
Life
is
going
on
And then
Let yourself stop
Let yourself be still
Allow the momentum to subside
Brave the quiet for just a second and realize
That the momentum pushing out all those pieces is coming from you and
All they want to do is come home
Give your pieces permission to stop and watch them fall back into their places within you
Keep your eyes open and look at all the ways you transformed your own world
Keep your eyes open and see that you are not scattered and shattered anymore
You are whole in every way
You do not need putting back together.