5 Reasons Why Cutting All Ties With Your Ex Is The Only Way To Actually Move On

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Let’s be honest, dealing with your ex is about as much fun as a root canal. I mean sure, there’s the slight temptation to stalk their whereabouts and poke fun at the new partner’s eyebrows but in hindsight, none of the above does you any favors. Trust me.

So with that in mind, here are five reasons cutting all ties with your ex is the only way to actually move on.

You let go of those disgustingly cute pet names.

All those cute little quirks you shared with your ex will still be there even after the relationship isn’t. Spending time together is an open invitation for pet names and inside jokes to creep their way back in again, leading you to forget the very reason you broke up in the first place. So do yourself a favor “Love Bug Boodle Boo Boo” and steer clear.

You deal with the emotional whiplash in private.

One thing’s for certain – you don’t want your ex in the line of fire when those emotions come rushing to the surface. And they always do like a moth to the flame which is why a healthy outlet in the form of drinks with friends or the gym is going to serve you better than a screaming match with your ex any day of the week.

You can find you again.

When you’re one half of a couple, a part of your identity is carved from being involved in a relationship with another human. And then, in quite literally the space of a single conversation, this all changes and so begins the steady road back to finding you again. A new path to all of your likes, dislikes, priorities, and values as a single person with a single agenda. It takes patience and dedication to reconnect with yourself which is why an ex still pulling at your heartstrings can make it even harder.

You can learn from the relationship.

It’s true what they say; love is blind. And when you’re caught in the emotional rampage of it all it can be hard to see things for what they truly are. By removing yourself completely from your ex, you can start to assess what happened in the relationship and the role you played. I truly believe no relationship is a mistake and instead, a lesson to be learned and an opportunity for growth in your next one. After all, how can you truly know what it is that you want without knowing what it is that you don’t want…

You heal your heart for someone else.

With every love that leaves, a small piece of your heart is taken with it, leaving a hole in its place. And in order to heal we have to shut ourselves off, giving our heart the opportunity to beat again in its new form. Each time we entertain the novelty of what ifs with our ex, we expose that hole again and never give it the chance to fully recover. Someone out there, the right someone for you, deserves your whole heart and not the car wreck that’s left immediately after a breakup in its place. The wait is worth it, I promise. 

When all is said and done, breakups truly are the pits. And for the parents out there, I’d like to dedicate this piece to you because you may not have the option of cutting all ties. How some of you speak to your ex whilst avoiding the urge to dropkick them between the legs on a regular basis is astounding. I salute you. TC mark

Writer from the UK building mental resilience. Escalators scare me.

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