Moving On From The Wrong Person

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They say you can’t choose who you fall in love with; this I believe to be true.

When it comes to falling in love, we think with our hearts. We choose to ignore our insecurities, our flaws and the stark incompatibles between us that seem so unimportant and insignificant at the beginning.

It will be a roller coaster with peaks and dips and varying velocities. At the beginning the adrenaline and the thrill will kick in and give you a rush that nothing else will ever give you. You ascend and descend alongside one another; all the while remaining close and hand in hand. Sometimes you may lose grip but you will always find a way back. For a while nothing else in the world will matter because it’s just you two against everything and everyone. But sooner or later the ride will begin to decelerate; the adrenaline and the thrill will subside and as you get closer and closer to the ground you realize that the ride won’t last forever. Of course, you can get on again and experience it over and over and over…but ultimately, it will always come to an end.

You can’t choose who you fall in love with. You also cannot choose who you fall out of love with.

I have learned it is completely possible to be simultaneously happy and unhappy in someone’s presence. It’s a conflict of interests. Your heart tells you to stay. It romanticizes the memories you share and reminds you solely of the loveliest times, whilst promising a future of rainbows and butterflies. But your brain tells you to go. It forces you come face-to-face with reality and reminds you that whilst you’ve had the highest highs together, you’ve also had the lowest lows. Lows that outnumber and overshadow the highs.

Deep down, we all know when something has had its time in this world. We can either ignore it, prolong the pain and delude ourselves that someday things will work out okay in the end, or we can do what is best, accept that all things come to end and move onwards with our lives.

But moving on is never straightforward. Personally, I do not believe it’s even possible. Our heart will always bear the burden of our memories. People come in and out of our lives for a reason and whether it’s for better or for worse, we learn from it. Appreciate and cherish the memories but don’t get lost in them — it’s all too easy to look back and not forward.

Don’t for a second doubt the decision you made, because at the time you made it, it was the right one for you.

featured image – Jonathan Kos-Read