Anxiety Is A Contradiction

Anxiety exhausts me but won’t let me sleep.

I lie in my bed and feel the adrenalin course through my veins as anxiety consumes my body.

Anxiety is a creature sitting on my chest tying beautiful bows with my stomach.

It pulses through my temples and it oozes out of my pores.

Anxiety sends tremors through my fingers.

 

Anxiety constricts and hardens all of my muscles.

Leaving me no choice but to lie still and take it’s beating.

 

Anxiety deafens me but it’s all I can hear.

Anxiety is the voice dripping disapproval into my mind.

Every thought tainted with questioning regret.

Anxiety is a constant interrogation playing out live in my mind.

Anxiety tells me not to speak by stealing the words out of my mouth leaving it dry and empty.

 

Anxiety makes me fragile and it makes me tough.

Anxiety breaks me down and tears me apart.

 

It leaves me deserted in the morning to put myself back together.

I look into my reflection and I can see anxiety through my eyes.

I can see the pieces I put back in the wrong place, or not at all.

Anxiety watches me and laughs because it knows what I look like inside.

Sometimes I laugh back.