This Time, I’m All In

Dear self,

I know I haven’t always been the kindest towards you. I know that I’ve beat you down emotionally and made you feel like you weren’t good enough. I know that I didn’t take care of your body. I didn’t take the time that I knew you desperately needed, and for that I am so sorry. I know that an apology can only go so far, but I just want you to know that things will be different this time. This year I’m dedicated to falling in love with you.

I know it’s cliche to say, “I want to fall in love with myself and life again,” but I want you to know that I really mean it. Starting now I’m going to make time for you. I’m going to listen to you. I’m going to start eating better. I’m going to start working out consistently. I’m going to start meditating. I’m going to start taking some “me time.” I’m going to learn when to rest. I’m going to cut the toxic people out of my life. I’m going to start interrupting my anxious thoughts by saying, “But what if it does work out?” I’m going to take time to believe in myself and calm my mind. I am going to fall in love with every single breath, because that’s what you deserve.

They say it takes 21 days to form a habit. Twenty-one days to change our life and become the person we always thought we could be. We lost ourselves last year because I didn’t believe in you. But now, one year later, I need you to know that I believe in you. I believe in us. I’m going to make sure all of our hopes and dreams come true. I know that with the proper care we can accomplish anything we put our mind too. I’m going to make us so proud.

So this time, I’m all in.