In response to this article posted on Thought Catalog, I felt that men deserved to hear our side of the story. This isn’t really intended for anyone specific, I love all you guys out there. But these are the behaviors I find the most deplorable, and forgive me for saying so. #sorrynotsorry.
1. You don’t call or text us back.
Also known as the slow fade. Once a man has decided he no longer wishes to be with someone, there is no changing his mind. This is a widely accepted fact, and something that we (women) are very well aware of. Not wanting to be with someone is acceptable, but ignoring them entirely/pretending they do not exist is childish and immature. Women are more educated than men now, ALMOST as prominent in the workplace, and hell, we even are allowed to vote and wear pants now! Crazy times! So what makes you (guys) think that we are unable to handle a simple rejection? Believe us, if the tables were turned and we no longer wanted to see you, we would have no problem telling you this.
2. You like to tell us how we feel.
I cannot tell you how many arguments I have been in with a guy who has said, “You are acting crazy right now”. If I were a man expressing his feelings, I’d have balls. As a woman, I am crazy. How is this fair? How about we start insulting you in arguments? “UGH YOU ARE BEING SUCH A CHAUVINISTIC PIG RIGHT NOW.” Doesn’t feel too good does it?
3. You distract us from our friends, hobbies, and what is important to us.
I have so many friends who, pre-relationship, were independent, confident, and outgoing with very active social lives and myriad interests. Post-relationship, their identity is all but their own. They become so-and-so’s girlfriend. Now I’m not blaming individual men for this, but generally speaking, most relationships involve the women becoming a part of the man’s life, while giving up large portions of her own. For example: accumulating new interests or pretending to like sports. We don’t say we like things that we don’t actually like to get you to like us more; we try to like things that you like because we are kind and caring individuals and want to feel like a part of your life. WHY is this something that annoys you? How about you try to like some of our interests then, because football effing sucks. There, I said it.
4. You do not respect our choices.
Sexually speaking, if we told guys what our sex lives were ACTUALLY like, we’d all be called whores. It’s so bad that women even slut shame themselves! There is no secret penis threshold that makes a woman go from unsullied virgin to ruined woman. “Welp, that was number 37. Time to pack it in and adopt a cat because no man will marry me now.” For some reason, guys I’ve met are really uncomfortable with the idea that we may have actually had sex with someone before them. What is with this need to be the only penis in a woman’s life? So what, we masturbate and we have random drunken hookups, JUST LIKE YOU! We’re not so different… so let’s try and level the playing field shall we?
5. Burping and farting and bathroom humor.
I’m not mad at you guys for doing these things. I’m mad because we are not allowed to do them. We also aren’t allowed to joke about them like you are. I’m going to reveal one of the greatest cover-ups in human history: Women poop too. When we go to the bathroom to “powder our noses”… nope. Maybe the reason women go to the bathroom in pairs is to prove to the males around them that no one is pooping. If we exist in a world where every bodily function that a woman has is considered disgusting, well… shouldn’t that be seen as a whole new opportunity for comedic relief? Future props to whoever can successfully get a joke about period blood aired on Comedy Central.
6. The male upper thigh.
WHY SO PALE AND HAIRY? I know I added an extra thing, but WHY!