How To Handle Toxic Friends

Rugrats: Season 3
Rugrats: Season 3

Friends are the most crucial piece of the puzzle of life. Without good friends and loyal relationships the world would be a cold and lonely place. There is nothing better than a solid group of friends that you can always rely on. These people will stand by your side as you bask in your success but they will also be there to pick up the pieces when your world is falling apart.

I knew that I had found my best friend in seventh grade when I cut my own bangs in the bathroom and cried because I looked like Kimmy Gibler from Full House. Megan told me it was okay as she took the scissors from my hand and cut her own bangs exactly the same way so I would not be alone in this horrible tragedy. Unfortunately, friends like that are hard to find. We must also be mindful of the “snakes in the grass”. We have all had friends who demonstrated betrayal, deceit, jealousy, etc. Insecurity often tends to take the upper hand and those unsupportive friends may start to undermine your success. According to Merriam-Webster, to undermine means “to subvert or weaken insidiously or secretly.” Your twenties is the point in your life where you start to make something of yourself individually and professionally. All too often we see those who have fallen behind and are struggling to find their own identity. Whether this is a conscious or unconscious behavior it is still highly detrimental to the friendship. How do you handle this situation?

Be mindful

As long as you are mindful of the situation then you will not fall victim.

Identify the toxic friend

Who is it that is always undermining your success? Who is it that expresses joy at other’s failures? Who is making the friendship a competition?

Once you identify the toxic friend, fade them out.

You do not want to cause a huge blow out argument because this person was once your friend. This behavior may be unconscious and just a manifestation of their own insecurities. With that being said, their insecurities are not your problem to deal with.

Move on.

Use their manipulative behavior as an incentive to become more successful. There is nothing worse for the toxic friend than to see you continue to raise to your success. You have already faded them out of your life and they have been left in the dust as you conquer the world. TC Mark

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