It’s okay to cry — even cry in the pouring rain alone at a random bus stop. It’s okay to have no one by your side, to be passed by like a shadow on a busy street. Let it all be and let it all out. Allow yourself to be human, to for once experience life as it is. To feel so low and so overwhelmed that you’re convinced everyone is out to get you and it’s never going to get better.
Let fear run through your veins, through the questions that won’t stop spinning in your head: Will I ever amount to anything? Will I ever achieve anything worthwhile? Will I ever become the person I want to be, or this is all what I’m ever going to get? Realize that this is not an indie movie and you’re not the main character whose setback is ensured to have a happy ending coming out of it. Freak out at the thought that it might stay this way forever, and in 10 years’ time you might still sit around and ask yourself the same goddamn questions.
Now stop pretending to be strong. Stop trying so hard to keep it all together just so people will think your life is going great. Drop it. Fuck it. Be real and be vulnerable. Accept that sometimes things don’t go the way you want, and yes, it sucks. But let it suck. Let it get to you. Let it shake your core and make you wonder how you will ever get out of this shitty place. Let it wash over you and remind you that you’re still alive. Let it make you walk the shoes of different lives and grow your capacity of kindness and compassion.
Just like that, when life gives you lemon, squeeze that fucking lemon. If you are ever in doubt, if along the way you struggle to fight the obstacles, tell yourself this: Hard times are the times your character is tested.
Yes, I know, when life gets tough, it’s not easy to keep your head up all the time. The reality is, it’s not just tough for you. Many people are going through their own tunnel of misfortunes seeing no light out, and that’s how they all have their characters constantly tested. Many admit defeat and never become anything more. Most live a mediocre life and settle for whatever is at their feet.
However, a good few rise above their circumstances and turn hardship into opportunities to learn and grow. They know the importance of perseverance and resilience to success and they prove to themselves that they’ve got what it takes to turn their life around.
Now, which one do you want to be? What choice are you going to make? What story are you going to tell yourself in 10 years’ time? What are you going to do right at this moment?
For sure, you can throw yourself a pity party and walk away from your dream life and dream future. You can blame everyone around you and blow yourself up with negativity, envy and self-loath. You can take whatever is thrown at you and decide this is what you’re worth. You can let yourself drown and keep drowning until you completely forget you were ever above the water.
To be fair, there is nothing inherently wrong with that. As long as you can keep yourself alive, you’ve done your part of being a human species on earth. BUT just pause for a second and ask yourself this: Is that all? Is it that easy to knock you down? Are you really going to quit now and let life pass you by like a living dead while there is so much in you and so much more you can do?
OR, you realize that you always have choices and in hard times, quitting is the easier option. It suddenly hits you that this is it. This is exactly what makes the difference between winners and losers in life. This is what divides the good few who make history and the rest that never reach the finish line of their potentials. This is the deciding moment to steel the wheel of your ship and have full control over where you are going to end up. It’s all in your hands. It lies at the power of your mind and the willingness of your heart.
Be brave and answer yourself this simple question: Are you going to take action?
If you dare to say yes — the yes to who you want to be and the life you want to lead, you’ve given yourself the chance to succeed, and in fact, you’re already half way there. Because it means when life gives you lemon, your choice is to let it drive you and change you and make you a better person.