Life can be tough and wrecked with chaos, happiness, frustration, and despair all at once or in successions. When things are going bad, it can seem like it is never ending and it can be tough to see your way through a situation. In these moments, it is so easy to become depressed, worn down, and just feel like you can’t take it anymore.
We live in a world of constant instant gratification, so when your needs are not being quickly met, it’s easy to want to throw in the towel. But when you have these moments, I want you to think of your scenario a little differently. It will go against your normal thought process, but trust me it will help you in those moments when you are struggling to keep moving forward.
Here are 7 ways you can push yourself forward so you can beat that feeling of wanting to give up:
1. Study people you admire.
You’ll be surprised, even the most successful and most accomplished went through a lot of you know what to reach their goals. Hamilton, one of our founding fathers, is an excellent example of someone who overcomes so many odds that easily could have derailed his accomplishments. But, he was relentless. He kept persevering. He just wouldn’t give up. And while he died young, he made sure to focus on what he felt was his life purpose leaving a strong impact on his family’s history, his legacy, and our country.
2. Spend time doing things for others.
There is an old adage that there is more happiness in giving than receiving. When you fill your mind and space with ways you can do good for others, it leaves less space for negative thoughts, lowers your depression, and it also helps you to have a happy spirit. It’s inevitable that when you bring a smile to someone’s face, or touch their lives in a positive way, that it creates a ripple effect of positivity.
3. Focus on what you do have versus what you are lacking.
One of my peers always jokes that when he starts feeling too entitled and complaining about his life’s woes, his wife reminds him that he has first world problems.
Often times you can get so deep in your own headspace that in focusing on what you don’t have, you lose sight of everything you do have. When you are feeling like you are lacking, you aren’t enough, or you have some FOMO, do a quick inventory. Write down 3 things that you are grateful to have RIGHT NOW! Start with the basics i.e. good health, being able to breathe, family, friends and go a little deeper. You’ll be surprised at how your mind shifts and you realize that you have a lot in which to feel grateful.
4. Positive personal affirmations are a game changer.
Positive thoughts lead to more positive results. And negative thoughts lead to negative results. The biggest fight you will have is with your own mind. Your mind, while it is our most powerful weapon, can also be your deadliest.
What you thinketh you becometh so be careful of what you feed your mind. When you are having negative thoughts, think of some positive thoughts to counteract the negative ones. We have millions of thoughts in our head in a given moment, but practice eliminating negative talk and negative chatter.
Find one or two things that you can repeat to yourself when you are in a negative place and you will be surprised at how these small thoughts can change your mindset in a positive way. We fuel our bodies with food, but we also have to feed our minds with positive thoughts.
Here are a couple of my favorite affirmations I use to get out of my own headspace:
“There are great things in store for me!”
“I am capable of moving forward, using my own wisdom, knowledge, and power!”
5. You are the company you keep.
It’s weird, but you are indeed the sum of the people in your immediate circle. Hang around people who have bad habits, no drive or discipline and it’s likely that eventually, you will start to emulate them too.
It’s weird, but humans are very much in sync with one another. A great way to break the habit of being around people who just aren’t good for you is to purposefully be around others who are where you want to be and who challenge you.
Change your inner circle to help aid you in seeing things differently. Find networking opportunities of others who have had success in their particular field, hobby, endeavor, etc. People often think that successful people are lucky and some are, but there are a lot of successful people who have gone through lots of setbacks, difficult situations, and used these experiences to propel them to a much better place. Pick friends and peers who are smarter, wiser and more successful than you. You can learn a lot and they can help you also change your outlook on things.
6. When you feel like you aren’t enough and you hit a major roadblock, take some time for self-reflection.
Be introspective and think of three things you accomplished that you didn’t even think were possible. Mentally walk through how you got through those difficult situations, how you felt, what it did to you and how it felt coming out of the other side. Recounting your success, looking at it from a perspective of overcoming it and realizing that you made it through something you didn’t think you could handle can be the impetus for moving you forward.
7. Create an alter-ego to help you mentally elevate who you are and where you want to go.
Anyone a fan of the show Billions? I love this show because it has badass characters that all have different dispositions, challenges, personalities, and roadblocks to being seen for who they are and trying to find their way even when it appears the odds are not stacked in their favor. And you know what is cooler, they all have a shot at success. Why? Because there is more than one path, personality trait or traits, that lead to the path of success.
I bring it up because sometimes you have to just fake it until you make it. Nothing is totally clear cut and only through valid real-life experiences can you figure out how to make things work or get through an obstacle or stumbling block.
So when you really are struggling to find your voice, your way or just figure it out; channel someone who you admire for their bravado and fierceness. It can be a superhero, alien, Android, or whatever makes you feel like you can accomplish anything. The point is that you use this moniker or alias when you need to in order to walk into your power or figure out where you need to go.
The good thing about life is no one has all of the answers. We are all on an even playing field in that way. The best thing is that you can always start over, do better, and recalibrate. Life is a constant teaching tool. You just have to be open to the challenge.
The next time you want to give ups, practice these 7 things so you can get back on track. And remember, it is often when someone has wanted to give up but kept going that they got to exactly where they needed to go.
Now, go and get ’em!