Make This The Year You Stop Saying ‘Slut’ And Encouraging Double Standards

Franca Gimenez
Franca Gimenez

With a new year comes the same double standards that we have for men and women, and as such, I’d like to talk about the “s” word. No, not that one- I’m talking about the word “slut.” You know, that word we casually and quite often throw around to describe women who have casual and/or frequent sex.

When I think of that word, I’m reminded of the admonition Tina Fey’s character delivers to a group of teenage girls in the classic movie “Mean Girls”: “You have GOT to stop calling each other sluts and whores. That just makes it ok for guys to call you sluts and whores.”

I’m gonna have to agree with her on that one: The next time you call a woman a “slut,” bear in mind that there’s really no male equivalent to such a word, at least not one which has a negative connotation. It’s the year 2016, and I think it’s time that women are allowed to engage in sex as casually and freely as they so choose without being labeled something derogatory because of it.

Sure, it’s one thing to try to reclaim the word or to use it in a light or joking manner. However, it’s still common to criticize or think poorly of women who have several sexual partners, while men who act similarly rarely elicit such criticism, or are even thought of as cool or appealing.

Let’s make 2016 the year that we start to do away with the harmful double standards we hold for women and men. I’ve approached this by breaking things down in the form of ‘SLUT ‘ as an acronym.

S: Stop Commenting On And Criticizing Women’s Sexual Choices

I admit that not judging others is often easier said than done, but in regards to decisions that women make when it comes to sex, it’s important that we try to do so. As long as all involved individuals are consenting adults, it’s not really your right and it’s certainly not necessary to comment on or label people for their sexual choices.

If a woman wants to remain a virgin until she gets married, that’s fine. If she wants to sleep with 40 men before she gets married, that’s fine too. Again, women are far more often the victim of unfair criticisms and labels than men, when it comes to their sexuality, and we should try to put an end to that.

L: Leave Outdated Ideas Behind

There are, sadly, still many people who feel that if a woman rarely or never partakes in sex or promiscuous behavior, she’s a “prude,” but if she does so too often or casually, she’s a “slut.” We can’t f*cking win.

In the year 2016, let’s leave outdated ideas like these behind. Again, a woman’s sexual decisions are only hers to make, and she is not defined by them. Something so personal isn’t the mark of a person’s character, and, again, since we don’t really have terms like “prude” or “slut” for men, at least not those bearing the same weight or negative association, it’s time to stop categorizing and forming opinions of women based on their sexual choices.

U: Understand Why This Matters

For those of you who might be reading this and thinking, “Why does this double standard matter?” or “who cares?” I’ll let you know why: when we maintain different standards for women and men, the world, obviously, remains an unequal place. If we are going to achieve complete and total gender equality, something that is long past due, then we can’t continue to scrutinize, criticize, and label how women behave sexually while not doing so when it comes to men.

The answer isn’t to do the same to men, of course, but rather to respect the sexual choices of both sexes so long as consenting adults are involved. This is about empowering women by doing something that’s a step towards raising them up to the same level and standards to which men are held.

T: Treat Others How You Want To Be Treated

Alright, I might have stolen this one from a little thing known as “the golden rule,” but it’s something that’s relevant to this topic. If you wouldn’t want others to form negative opinions of you based on the (very) personal decisions you make which don’t affect them, such as how many individuals with whom you choose to have sex, then stop doing something like that to half the population. Let’s start to treat women with the same respect that we treat men when it comes to stuff like this.

So ladies: go and have sex as casually and often as you want as long as you’re safe and smart about it. Or don’t. It’s your choice, and 2016 should be the year we start to embrace and accept that fact without responding with any negative labels or opinions. TC mark

Related

More From Thought Catalog

blog comments powered by Disqus