Latest Posts

An Open Letter To Fran Lebowitz's Writer's Block

Originally, I was contemplating creating a YouTube video that would become an Internet sensation to present my plea for your abandonment of Fran’s body. Then I realized that such a video would be a wasted attempt: we both know Fran doesn’t “do” computers. Thus, I decided to write to you — yet another thing Fran doesn’t do.

On Being Friends With Identical Twins

I am not entirely sure how I first heard about the existence of identical twins, nor where my fascination stems from. Naturally, over time I had fallen in love with a young and innocent Lindsay Lohan in Parent Trap and thought about the vast array of activities I could avoid if I had the option of sending my twin to perform a perfunctory task.

Yes, I Am On The List: NYC Exclusive Nightlife

First things first, it’s highly unlikely there is an actual strict list. If there is a list, I have never been on it, and there is not one elitist nightowl business in NYC I haven’t found myself in past 4am. Yes, the title was a lie, but I promise I can negotiate my way in despite the fact I am not willing to spend $400 for a night of fun, and have never been featured in any tabloids.