Thought Catalog

14 Women Reveal How They Turned Their ‘FWB’ Relationship Into Something More

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1.

“Well, we had been friends for a pretty long time — like all through high school. Then we both came home during a winter break and were hanging out and ended up having sex on his basement couch lol. I had always had feelings for him, but he just wanted to be hookups buddies. I agreed, because I thought it might lead to more. We kept hooking up during college breaks until one day he asked me if wanted to go on a date. People say that FWB doesn’t lead to relationships, but in my case it did.”

— Jillian, 23

2.

“Me and this guy had been f*cking for a while, and then one April Fools Day I showed him a fake pregnancy test I got at some gag store. He totally freaked out! It was hilarious! After I told him it was just a joke, he was pissed off for a minute but then started laughing too. Then he was like, ‘Ya that was a joke, but I wouldn’t mind spending some more time with you though…’ We ended up dating for three years.”

— Cara, 26

3.

“When I was in college I was in this “on-and-off” relationship with a guy who was kinda a fuckboy. He would flake on all our dates, but have ALL the time in the world after 2:00am when he wanted me to come over. I thought we had some real chemistry, so I told him: If you want my body at night, we need to be more. I guess he thought I was a pretty good in bed, because we dated for a few months after.”

— Mel, 23

4.

“We had dated in high school, and in college started having sex again — but with a very strict no feelings policy. I was the first one to crack though haha, and asked if he wanted something more. We talked about it for a little bit and decided to give it another shot. We are engaged to be married now! I think it really has to do with communication and being direct about what you are feeling, because there’s no point in continuing something that isn’t making you happy.”

— Daisy, 27

5.

“My story is interesting because it was actually the MAN who caught feelings first. I was enjoying being single after a four year relationship ended, and kinda playing the field. He brought up a relationship, and kinda immaturely I laughed in his face. He worked really hard to woo me though (like cooking breakfast in the morning, taking me out on “casual” dates) and eventually I decided to give him a shot. The relationship lasted about six months, but it was a good ride.”

— Sammantha, 21

6.

“I actually met this guy in a group orgy I went to in college. I remember thinking he was soooooooo fucking hot and wanting him really badly. We did things at the “event” and exchanged contact information. For the next two years we spent countless nights together, and it was seriously the best sex I ever had.

Then one day, after he left, I realized I missed him. Not just his body. But him. I brought up the idea of dating, and he was really hesitant. But after talking about it, he both decided to give it a shot. It didn’t end up being a “forever” relationship, but it was a good year-ish.”

— Jasmine, 26

7.

“Right after college I was hooking up with this dude who I had met through mutual friends. I told him that I thought he could be something more, and he got mad. Like really mad. He said that I was ruining our great FWB set-up, and I said I didn’t give a fuck. He stormed away, and we didn’t talk for like three weeks.

Eventually he texted me some booty call, and I told him “no way” after how he had acted. He ended up coming over and we talked about. He decided to give a relationship a chance, and so far so good!”

— Cynthia, 24

8.

“We had actually dated before, but it didn’t work out because he kept cheating on me. I would always catch him, and the lies were just so unbearable. But we kept having sex, because he was good in bed and I am very…needy.

One day I brought up the idea of us dating again, and he said he liked what we had atm. Eventually we talked more about it and we decided to try an open relationship. I’m not sure how I feel about it, but we’re making it work?”

— Iris, 23

9.

“I was the “other woman” in this situation…I was a fuck buddy to this guy who was one of my co-workers. We would do it all the time in his car, in hotels, at work. I felt guilty about what I was doing to his wife, and asked him to leave her. He did, and we’ve both never been happier!”

— Anonymous

10.

“It’s just always a really hard situation to navigate. On one hand, we’ve all been told that casual sex doesn’t usually lead to a relationship. On the other hand, we want to stay close to the guy we are crushing on. In my case, I tried to be up-front and honest when I knew I was feeling something more than just sex. He was really understanding about it, and decided to take it day-by-day and told me we could stop having sex if I wanted. Eventually we gave each other a shot, and we’re still together today!”

— Rebecca, 20

11.

“This actually happened with me and my childhood best friend. We had always been inseparable, but our relationship was always strictly platonic. One time we went out as a part of a larger group, and ended up making out at this bar (he had just broken up with his girlfriend, and I was in a BIG dry spell). He both decided we wanted more and went back to his apartment to fuck.

We kept hooking up for a while until we both admitted that friends-with-benefits wasn’t going to work for us. We gave dating a shot, and 6 months, so far so good!”

— Rachel, 26

12.

“Don’t give them sex. If you have feelings for someone, don’t keep hooking up with them. Tell them straight: if you want this, you have to make this something real. Some people will say you can’t blackmail people for sex to find love, but that’s how me and my husband made it work.”

— Laurie, 27

13.

“So I met this boy on Tinder, and we both wanted sex and started hooking up right away. I had a really good time with it for a while, but I started noticing my friends who were having sex with actual partners, and I wanted that too. After about three months of just being hookup buddies, I asked him if he was interested in something more and we both decided to give it a shot.”

— Jessie, 22

14.

“My life is kind of a mess haha, but I’ll try to condense this story. Me and this guy, let’s call him “Bill,” were hooking up a lot. One time after having sex he told me that he was about to be evicted from his apartment because he lost his job. I invited him to stay with me.

So that worked well for a while, until I realize that I had COMPLETELY head over heels fallen for him. I brought it up with Bill one night, and he said that he really wasn’t interested in anything from me except sex. “Well then,” I told him. “I guess you’re not interested in staying in my apartment either!” He suddenly got really panicky and changed his tune in a hurry. We dated for a few months and it wasn’t bad.”

— Bethany, 22 TC mark

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