1. When our slutty bellboy first lays eyes on “The Donald:”
My loins trembled as the scent of toupee adhesive and spray tan swept through my nasal cavity. I wanted nothing more than to turn around and see the golden god behind these scents, but I couldn’t move. I was frozen. There was a tap on my shoulder, “young man” the voice said. I thought to myself “oh my god, could this be him?”
2. When Trump notices the bellboy’s interest
As he got further and further, my eyes continued to be glued to his rear end. His gorgeous ass flapped behind him like a mouthwatering stack of pancakes in his pants. My hunger for pancakes had never been stronger. And that’s when it happened. He looked back. He caught me staring at his donk.
3. When the “package” gets delivered to Trump’s door
It felt like an eternity. I wiped the sweat from my forehead and put my hand up to his door to knock. He answered the door wearing only a robe. The robe open just enough for me to see his beautiful saggy chest. A chest that would give Betty White a run for her money.
“Finally, I’ve been waiting” Trump complained and he took his bags and slammed the door. My heart sank. I guess he just wanted his bags? As soon as I began to pick up the pieces of my shattered heart, the door whipper open again. “I almost forgot” he said as he handed me a wad of money as a tip.
4. But should he give Trump the D???
Should I go back to meet him at 8pm? No. I can’t do that. What am I thinking? I’m thinking about him. I couldn’t fight it anymore. I had to admit it, I wanted his geriatric 2006 Perez Hilton jello body, and I wanted it bad. Before long we had a new problem, my lustful thoughts had awoken the purple-headed yogurt slinger in my wants. This walk was getting real…hard, real fast.
5. Then the bellboy tries to describe Trump to his roommate
“What’s up, you fat bitch” she asked.
“Not a whole lot,” I lied. I had to. I couldn’t tell her.
“Why are you acting so fucking weird?” she asked.
“I’m not, I said. “I met a boy.”
“Is he cute?” she asked as she made a sandwich.
“Gorgeous. His face is wrinkled like a beautiful overflowing flesh toilet,” I said, daydreaming.
6. En route to the sordid encounter, the anticipation builds…
The walk there was short, but felt like an eternity. I was so nervous for our second meeting. Never in my wildest dreams could I imagine this happening. I reached the building and made my way up the elevator, my heart and meat monster both throbbing more and more with each floor we passed.
7. Then sexy times begin
I knocked gently on the penthouse door. The door creacked open and there he was, handsome as ever, like a giant melting fat carrot with fake fake hair. He was wearing a gorgeous suit.
“You look good” he said, as I entered the room. He locked the door behind me and asked if I wanted to take a seat.
“Why did you ask me here?” I said as I sat down.
“You know why I asked you here.”
8. And the temperature goes up!
He brushed his hand against my cheek, leaving a stream of self tanner dripping down me.
9. Sexual tension building like hell now.
He sat beside me and put his hand on my thigh, caressing me up and down. The only thing I knew was that I wanted to ride the elevator to the top of his Trump Tower.
10. Will love prevail?
He moved closer, putting his cold, dead lips on my neck. I shivered with excitement. His hands felt like an old dried out gingerbread house. I was in love.
11. Or just sex?
I was reluctant, but obedient. I unzipped his pants and touched his cold scaly thighs. I opened my eyes as I grabbed his thick, long …
There is an UNBELIEVABLE twist at the end, but if you want to know what it is, you’ll have to buy the book.