Is your girl satisfied in bed? No really, is she? How would you know if she wasn’t? Most women don’t want to hurt our partner’s feelings and it’s always a little uncomfortable telling someone you love they aren’t performing in the ways that make your body feel good. It’s awkward.
There are, however, a few hints that almost all girls gives either unintentionally (or sometimes intentionally) that signal you aren’t really aren’t doing it for us – or to us – in the right way. (PS: Want to get better in bed? Here’s 9 sexy tips from a sex therapist.)
1. She gives excuses as to why she can’t have sex.
This one is so obvious that it should hit you in the face with a big flashing WARNING SIGN, but soooo many guys miss it. Sure, sometimes we really do have a headache or we’re just tired but if “sleepiness” becomes a regular roadblock to a party in the bedroom, it’s time to start wondering what else is going on. If your girl’s not interested in partaking in one of life’s most exhilarating activities with you, it might be because she doesn’t enjoy doing it with you.
2. She rushes through sex.
If you do make it to the bedroom but she skips right past the foreplay, it’s another sign that you might just not be that good. A quickie is great every once in a while, but if it becomes a regular thing to skip foreplay and jump right to the orgasm, she’s probably a little more interested in the release than in you. Good sex is like good food: you savor and enjoy what tastes good but you rush through a meal that’s only purpose is to nourish you.
3. She doesn’t care if she doesn’t orgasm.
Admittedly, girls can be a little tricky to work out down there, but if she’s stopped trying to reach orgasm with you, it’s a pretty good indicator that she doesn’t think you have the skills to get it done. She may love you enough to engage in the act, but if she’s stopped trying to get the same release for herself, it might be because you just haven’t been doing her right.
4. She plays director in the bedroom.
Some girls are just bossy, but if you hear a constant string of “No, don’t do that, move here, put your hands here,” the problem might actually be you. If a lady likes what you’re doing, she’s not going to constantly tell you to do something else.
5. She doesn’t cuddle afterwards.
Does your girl disappear as soon as the deed is done? That might be a sign that she’s frustrated with you. Sex can be a very bonding experience and if your girl wants to roll over or walk away as soon as it’s over, you can probably conclude that she isn’t feeling what your giving, no pun intended. (Trust me, if I just spent the last hour frustrated with you, the last thing I want to do is snuggle up to you.)
6. She masturbates more than she has sex with you.
Do I really need an explanation for this one? Logic says you want more of the thing that feels best. If she wants more of something that isn’t you….bingo. If you can’t rock her body right, then she’ll just have to do it herself.
7. She makes comments about the great sex her friends are having.
Do you need a hint bigger than this one? “Suzy and Tom have sex three times a week and she orgasms every time!” It’s the same as when she drop hints about what her friends’ husbands bought them for their birthdays right about the time that hers rolls around. She wants what her friends have and she is mentioning it because YOU aren’t giving it to her.
8. She suggests changing it up in the bedroom.
People make suggestions when they want to make things better so if she’s coming to you with new ideas, it might be because she is not fully satisfied with what you are offering her now. Listen to her!
9. She seems preoccupied.
If you two are going at it and her mind seems elsewhere, chances are it’s because she isn’t enjoying herself. It’s like sitting through a lecture. “I showed up but I’m really bored and I’m thinking about everything except being here, and I’m trying to stay awake…” If she isn’t engaged in the moment, it’s because you aren’t offering enough to make her want to pay attention.