You meet a guy who checks all the boxes on your dream husband list. He’s smart, successful, in shape, owns a beautiful town home, and spends his free time traveling to exotic places.
On the first date, he takes you to a nice restaurant overlooking the water. Somewhere in between his story of closing that difficult business deal and telling you about his funny labrador retriever, you become totally smitten. You’re certain he has soulmate potential.
You spend the next week daydreaming about your perfect future together… until things take a turn for the worse… and he turns out to be a total jerk who is controlling with money and seems to only care about himself.
Heartbroken, you wonder how you missed all the red flags.
Don’t beat yourself up!
It’s natural to get excited when you meet someone you with major potential. But, when it comes to dating, moderation is key!
And the most powerful way to achieve moderation is to casually date a couple of guys at the same time without having sex (kissing and some canoodling is OK) with any of them.
Approaching dating this way enables you to take things slow and find men who will really stay the course. And it gives you time to assess whether a guy is truly right for you.
During these early stages of dating someone, I recommend you ask yourself the following key questions to see if they have true soulmate potential. These will help you quickly weed out the duds so you can focus on the guys who have “It” going on — the ones who have long-term potential.
- Is he quick to pick up the check after a date?
- Is he empowered in his life?
- Does he envision what he wants and then go for it?
- Is he learning and growing as a person and in his career?
- Do you feel you can be yourself with him?
- Does he shows signs that he thinks marriage is a great or at least a good thing?
- Does he treat wait staff well?
- Is he considerate, thoughtful and loving towards people?
- Does he come from a family where there were role models of loving marriages?
- Do you feel good about yourself with him?
- Does he compliment you and ask you thoughtful questions about yourself and life?
- Is he supportive of your success?
- Is he mostly positive when talking about previous relationships?
The more yeses, the more likely he has real soulmate potential and can keep up with a successful, smart woman like you.
Remember you deserve a great guy who is not only an equal but also treats you like the amazing catch that you are. The more quickly you let go of the duds, the sooner you’ll meet the One!