I may not understand everything that’s happening in my life right now, but I’m choosing to hold on to the fact that everything has a purpose. I may be overwhelmed with questions as to why certain things are happening in my life, but my faith is not dependent on my feelings. This season of pain and struggle in my life is proof that You are still good and You are with me every step of the way.
I know that I have a lot of questions filled with doubt and fear, and I’m trying my best not to have the urge to control the outcomes of my life. No matter how hard I pray or how hard I try to control outcomes, I know I’ll end up more frustrated because You are the one in control of everything. Despite the fact that everything doesn’t make sense and it’s easy to be overwhelmed with darkness, I know that You are the light I need to get through this season of my life.
God, I am truly sorry for the times when I thought that if I prayed hard enough, you would change the outcome of a situation in my life. I’m truly sorry for thinking that prayer is a form of manipulation when in truth, prayer should be a form of showing You just how much I love you, despite my pain and heartbreak. I am truly sorry for the times when I lost my faith when You refused to answer my prayer. I know that You have a purpose in everything that happens and I will just choose to hold on to You even tighter because of this. Most of all, I’m truly sorry for all the times when I blamed You and cried to You for thinking that You didn’t care about the pain I’m going through. I know You care. In fact, You care so much for us that You made the ultimate sacrifice and let Your son die for us to save us from our sins, and that is the purest form of love.
The truth of the matter is that struggles show us more about our faith than we’ll ever know. I know that despite things not going the way as planned, my faith will continue to have a foundation that is stronger than anything.
God, you are stronger than every giant and every struggle that I’m ever going to overcome. You are stronger than every feeling of darkness, desperation, hopelessness, and fear. You are stronger than depression, than cancer, than any illness that comes into our lives. You are far greater than everything that is bound to destroy us.
You are the God of outcomes and You are the God of miracles and breakthroughs, and no amount of pain can ever change that.