‘I’d Like This More If It Wasn’t On Sale’ – Your 2013 Black Friday Playlist

Shutterstock
Shutterstock

You may know Babe Walker from her highly popular and introspective memoir White Girl Problems. She recently curated a “Black Friday” playlist, which we thought was definitely worth a share. Says Babe,  “For all you psychos who are venturing into the void known as Black Friday, here are some songs to aid you on what will no doubt be a troubling shopping journey.”

The playlist is embedded below, complete with hilarious commentary from Walker. Happy shopping!

  1. Flim – Aphex Twin – “Get in a place of zen and focus on the mission ahead. Feel thin/modely because you only had a glass of white wine, a Marlboro Light and one serving of broccolini for Thanksgiving dinner.”

  2. Free Your Mind – Cut Copy – “Center yourself, breathe, repeat your mantra. Walk into a Nordstrom. Trust that the universe will deliver a Helmut Lang angora sweater for 70% off.”

  3. Do My Thang – Miley Cyrus – “Realize that trolling the sales rack isn’t for you and go to Barneys instead.“

  4. Obsession – Animotion – “See the hiking boot-esque platforms from Prada F/W 2013 and realize your life has been incomplete up to this point.”

  5. Raped And Freezin’ – “Alice Cooper – Buy the Prada platforms. Feel triumphant. Move to the ready-to-wear floor.”

  6. Violet – Hole – “Realize they’re sold out of The Row handbag of your dreams and feel like dying.”

  7. Nobody Asked Me (If I Was Okay) – Sky Ferreira – “Find a quiet dressing room in which you can curl up and silent scream.”

  8. Enjoy The Silence – Depeche Mode – “Silent screaming is basically the equivalent of 30 minutes of intense cardio. Try on a blazer and practice your catwalk.”

  9. Pepper – Butthole Surfers – “Find an incredible Rodarte dress. Even though the world can be a cold place, all is not lost.”

  10. Inspector Norse – Todd Terje – “Celebrate your purchases. You did great.”

  11. Shoplifters Of The World Unite – The Smiths – “Play a song for Winona. Send her good vibrations.”

  12. Always Forever – Cults – “Accept that shopping is your boyfriend, girlfriend, wife, lover, mother, father, sister, brother.  Love you. Mean it.”

More From Thought Catalog