We have days full of sunshine, upbeat music, smiles, and greetings; we have cloudy days, sad music, tears, and lots of goodbyes. There was a point in my life where I had both, I felt like the luckiest girl in the world, everything seemed great, and my lover made me feel so happy. That’s where I thought; what happens when you put life in the hands of another person? Even worse, what happens when you put YOUR life in the hands of a broken person?
We fall for pretty words and pretty faces, but we also fall for broken hearts. Kind people, good people, tend to help others and try to fix their issues; I know that because I’m one of those people, I’ve always been. I see beauty in the pieces of broken hearts; I admire the vulnerability of a sad soul, I like to help those who get lost, and sometimes I forget that I’m risking my stability. However, when you learn to love yourself more than others, helping the broken is not a problem; you know your worth and understand that things don’t always go the way we plan them.
I fell for a broken heart once, the beautiful pieces of a sweet, loving, caring, and passionate spirit, or whatever was left of it. Those around me didn’t seem to understand why I was dealing with such “trouble” when it wasn’t my place to be at; maybe it wasn’t, but what if it was? I would’ve never known unless I tried to get close, so I did. I got to know a beautiful person on a deeper level, trust was the foundation of our relationship, and his vulnerability attracted me in a way I couldn’t quite comprehend. Nothing made sense, we didn’t make sense, and the longer I decided to remain by his side just showed me how much love and affection he needed.
Falling for a broken heart feels like searching for light inside the darkest room or looking at the stars on a cloudy sky, none of them are there just like their love, but you still try to find it.
Never in my plans was I thinking of falling for this person, but on a cold night, it was around 4 a.m. we were laying down in bed, laughing, telling each other our funny stories, all while listening to our favorite songs. That’s where I knew that every one of those broken pieces which belonged to somebody else had taken my whole heart to replace their emptiness.
After some time passed by, his heart stopped needing the warmth of mine, and I became the broken one… I have this theory that those who are broken become toxic to others who offer love and affection to their lonely soul. We’re all a little broken, but we must stop relying on the kindness of those who aren’t. Instead, send those who need to fix the damage away with love and allow them to heal on their own. Don’t stay to try and teach them how to do it; they must learn by themselves what self-love is and maybe one day they’ll become a healer who will fall for someone who is damaged. Only then, they will get a taste of what it feels like to fall for a broken heart.