Yes, it is true, shortly after the sun rises on November 5th, 30 will be upon me. And as I inevitably turn the page to this next chapter of my life, it is time to say goodbye to my twenties; but it’s not what you think. I am not saying goodbye because I have to (although I do), I am saying goodbye because I want to. Regardless of having no choice in the matter, I believe it’s for the best.
Our years together have been bittersweet to say the very least. When we first met, I thought we’d be together forever, living in a state of eternal bliss. We’d stay up all night, and sleep in late. Our biggest worry would be about making plans for the following weekend.
We had some great times, didn’t we? All the sunsets, and sunrises; the nights that lasted until morning. We danced, high on booze and life, and took walks of shame one too many times. Remember our random trips into the city at 3am after a night out? We were having so much fun we couldn’t bear to see it end. Man, we really lived.
As the years went on, we had some unexpectedly tough times. The party started to die down and most of the magic went with it. Life was staring us right in the face, and we didn’t know what to do with it. All those dreams we had in the early years were thrown on a shelf, possibly never to be brought to fruition.
We became depressed, sad, and anxious. The fun was surely over, and I wasn’t always sure you had my best interests at heart. You kept allowing me to make the same mistakes over and over again. You broke my heart in more ways than one, but now I see why….
You were trying to teach me, and you knew the only way to do that was to allow me to make my own mistakes. I swear, sometimes it was as if God came down and slapped me in the face, and I still didn’t listen. But you didn’t judge me, you believed in me. You picked me up off the floor time and time again and forced me to keep going.
You have taught me so many invaluable things, like how to be the person I want to be, the person I am, and I could have never done it without you. I thank you for that, but it isn’t enough. Now it is time to apply those lessons, and 30 is going to help me do that.
30 has offered me things you couldn’t possibly provide. A new beginning, new dreams; another chance to be the person I am. You see, I am not the same person I was when we met. I have changed. I am better.
We’ve been growing apart for some time now, surely you have noticed. This must not come as a huge shock to you. Unlike me, you knew our time together was limited. You knew that after the sun set, it would rise. You knew the party was ending.
I am not angry, I am thankful. Thank you for showing me the things I didn’t want to see. Thank you for being there when no one else was. Thank you for showing me how to live. I will always look upon you with fond memories, but that is all they are now, memories. Trust me, you will go on and find another. You will teach them what you taught me. Don’t be sad, be excited, you are 20 after all.
I have to go now. 30 is waiting. Goodbye forever, dear 20. You will always have a special place in my heart.