Pressure: The Fuel For A Mental Fire
Of course you love your family. However, lately you aren’t very excited to spend time with them. The conversations have shifted from casual every day topics, such as sports and movies to conversation about what you’re going to do with your life, more specifically your career. You have a job, granted it isn’t a job you want for the rest of your life, but its income. That isn’t good enough though. Now that you have graduated, they constantly offer opinions and advice and ask questions about what you are going to do with your degree. You start to dread seeing them because you don’t feel like you’re living up to their expectations. Your grandparents are always talking about how your grandfather worked two jobs while getting his masters, doctorate and raising three kids. It’s admirable and you look up to him for that, but that isn’t you. “Why isn’t that me?” you constantly ask yourself. The reason is you are lazy and unmotivated. You know what you want to do, but you have no sense of urgency. You’re comfortable. You think to yourself, “I’m only 24. I’m figuring things out and enjoying life on the way. Things will work out and I’ll be just fine.” But your family is telling you the opposite, “You need to be aggressive and strike while the iron is hot!” They have a point.
In the grand scheme of things you are doing just fine. You are not an alcoholic, you don’t do drugs, and you are not a chronic gambler, so why can’t they be content with that? But you do still live at home with your parents. So what? You are saving money and doing a pretty damn good job of it. That is not enough. Every opportunity they ask you if you’ve looked for jobs or made any contacts and then proceed to offer more opinions on it and what they did when they were in your shoes. It makes you feel down on yourself and irritable. Whenever anyone outside the family asks you what you are up to and about your job, you instantly feel rage and want to locate the nearest exit quickly. You feel like everyone is ganging up on you. You start to drive yourself insane between two philosophies: They are right, you need to get aggressive and make moves to better your future and do something they will be proud of and you will be proud of; or you are just fine and soon the motivation to find a better job than will kick in.
This constant struggle makes you want to buy a pack of smokes, a fifth of whiskey and indulge all the way to a straight jacket and padded room.
You start to wonder if anything you do is going to make your family truly proud. So proud that when your grandparents are playing bunko with friends, they can’t help but brag about what wonderful things their grandson is doing. You develop a chip on your shoulder that at times feels like an apartment building. Weighing you down. Weighing your spirit down.
Your family loves you and just wants what is best for you and that is not living in your parent’s house forever. They want you to be independent and you want the same thing. Some people don’t have families to be there support system. So your grandparents can seem like broken records about your job, but you have to appreciate them. You always make them proud and they always love you. Sooner or later you will dig deep, man up and find that motivation to chase your dreams. Sooner or later you will accomplish something they will be genuinely proud of and that chip on your shoulder that you have developed will combust and your mind will be at ease.
Right?