I finally realized one thing: you will find love again. It may take a while but you’ll get there. Hold on, Dear. The world is so much bigger and so much better than you think. The world won’t end with one “no”. And you will come to realize that one “no” is the start of a better life.
I don’t think you’ve ever been this happy with life because you stopped depending your happiness with someone. Imagine all the people you’ve met since you stopped having cluttered feelings? Aren’t they all genuine and sensible? How could you stop yourself from meeting those kinds of people? You’ll learn loads from them. Stop wasting your time with people who keeps on asking you how are you, have you eaten, and some other reoccurring questions they already know the answer to.
He should be asking how much you love your country, how do you think global state affects you, talk about how the digital world is the next big thing. Relevant things. Make conversations constant and deep. It’s information you already know yet never thought of, or if not, you’ll learn it from him. That’s the only way you’ll know they are worth your time.
Go and meet them all. Be friends! Enjoy each other’s company. In this way, you won’t regret liking someone because you know you learned a lot from them. Not just knowing how their day went but how life is as a whole for them. It’s their perspective you’re getting to know. Get out there learn how they think.
And maybe someday, when you’re better, when you’re ready, you’ll get to love for the first time.