1. I have to remember to get more hair elastics; I only have one on my wrist instead of my usual four.
2. It’s raining? UGH NO.
3. It’s only going to rain in the morning? Great, now I’ll have frizz hair for the rest of the day.
4. Do you think the employees at CVS know me by name because I’m always here buying hair stuff?
5. Why do people keep asking if my hair is naturally curly? Do you think I’d make it look like this on purpose?
6. STOP TOUCHING MY HAIR. JUST STOP.
7. I can’t wear this hat – my hair looks too good today.
8. I need to wear this hat – I look ridiculous without it.
9. Uh oh, I only have 4 bottles of hair product on reserve. Time to stock up!
10. I want to cut my hair but I know I’ll instantly regret it because my curls won’t fall the same way.
11. Should I get layers this time? Sometimes they work, but sometimes my hair takes on that weird triangle shape like that guy from Workaholics. Decisions, decisions.
12. Did that girl over there just call her hair curly? That’s wavy at best and I’m 99% sure it’s not natural either.
13. I’ve easily spent a thousand dollars on hair products so far in my lifetime. Imagine what I could’ve done with that money if I had straight hair.
14. Is the Keratin treatment worth it? Probably, but you have to do that whole “leave it alone” thing for days while it sets in and I don’t think I could do that.
15. Do I wash my hair today? Did I wash my hair yesterday?
16. I wonder if people realize I wear my hair in the same three ways over and over.
17. It’s almost humidity season. Dear god.
18. I’m only attempting to straighten my hair if there is a 20% chance of rain or below. Otherwise, it’s the biggest waste of time ever.
19. I wonder what people would think if I walked out of the house with my “finger-in-the-power-outlet” look I usually have going on in the morning. I’d probably scare all the kids in my neighborhood.
20. You know what? I’ll just throw my hair up in a bun. I don’t have time for this.