Like many other girls living in a Tinder world, I’ve dated my fair share of Scum Bags. You know, the guys who call you in the wee hours of the morning, tag you in Instagram photos without first responding to your texts, and those who wear sunglasses in the club. Okay, the last one was a stretch but you get the picture…
I’m telling you (yes, you) all of my beautiful and deserving women out there: give the Nice Guy a chance. Let him take you out for coffee and a stroll in the park (dare I say, SOBER). Let him laugh at your incredibly corny jokes and admire your annoying quirks. Allow yourself to fall for him, because you know that deep down he really is the best, and nice guys absolutely don’t finish last.
1. He takes interest in things you love.
My boyfriend understands my passion for (read: obsession with) health, and when I told him I wanted to try a colon cleanse, he surprisingly responded “let’s do it.” And so we dragged our dirty colons to the nearest health food store and pooped our large intestines clean for the next 10 days. Together.
Much to his contempt, he might even watch the Kardashians with you if it means seeing you smile, and if that’s not the sign of a keeper, I truly don’t know what is.
2. He goes out of his way to spend a minute longer with you.
To the Nice Guy, convenience isn’t a priority. His relationship with you is. He won’t make you feel guilty for not visiting his apartment enough, or choosing a restaurant out of his way. He’ll walk you to your subway line after a late night hang out and meet you for a drink near your office after a stressful day of work.
Even if he’ll have to rush home in the morning to put on a suit before work, as long as he has an unexpected night cuddling with you, he’s happy.
3. He introduces you to the crew.
This might be an obvious one, but the Nice Guy can’t wait to show you off to everyone who’s anyone to him. He’ll take you to work outings, out with the guys, heck, he’ll even take you to his shoe repair man just so he can hear the dude say how lucky he is to have you, in his thick Italian accent (true story).
4. He actually gives a shit about your wellbeing.
Unlike the Scum Bag, Mr. Nice Guy doesn’t want you to have that extra drink that’ll put you over the edge. He would never allow you to partake in his guilty vices and he genuinely cares about that extra hour of sleep that’ll prevent crankiness or that big meeting at work.
Plus, he might even make your bed when he’s done dirtying it.
5. He makes you feel your best.
Scum Bags have a tendency to make the girls in their path feel like, well, scum. Think: crazy, possessive, delusional, complicated, etc. Sound familiar? It wasn’t until entering into a healthy relationship that you’ll realize these things are very much circumstantial and not innate character flaws. A good sign that you’ve found the Nice Guy is that he will make you feel none of these things and so many good things.
This is in part due to the fact that Nice Guys value you for YOU. Yes, you can and will find someone who respects your love of a good Groupon deal (guilty) and is enamored by your bodily twitches, as you’re about to fall asleep.
6. He saves you time (from overthinking!).
One of the best things about a Nice Guy is that he isn’t struggling to get out of the friend zone. He doesn’t have a panty-dropping agenda and he isn’t trying to mind fuck you, either. The Nice Guy says what he feels, upfront and unapologetically. If he’s thinking about you, you’ll know. If he’s upset, he’ll tell you.
This means no more wasted energy on childish games and text fights, which means you can finally spend all that time you spent over thinking doing fun things, like traveling the world together or having incredible sex.
7. He keeps you happy on hump day.
You guys didn’t think I would leave this one out, did you? Shout out to my mom, who always reminded me that while looks fade, people don’t. Not to say the Nice Guy is inherently less attractive than his Scum Bag counterpart, because that is simply untrue and my boyfriend is a handsome hunk in my eyes, but consider this: if you can have good sex with someone who is inherently wrong for you, imagine how good sex can be with someone who loves, respects and honors you. Hint: mind-blowing. And he won’t kick you out afterwards.