Damn, Eating P and Sucking the D Might Give You Oral Cancer

At the recent annual AAAS (American Association for the Advancement of Science) conference this past February, one topic was the relationship between oral sex and oral cancer. Researchers brought to light some startling and distressing news for those of us who like to go downstairs while we are going at it: oral sex has actually replaced smoking as the leading cause of oral cancer, because that sexual act can spread HPV, a virus commonly associated with several different types of cancer.

Ohio State University’s Dr. Maura Gillison reported at the conference that “an individual who has six or more lifetime partners – on whom they’ve performed oral sex – has an eightfold increase in risk [of developing oral cancer] compared to someone who has never performed oral sex.”

Presumably, “lifetime partners” is just a euphemistic way of saying “sexual partners” – this is distressing information for anyone getting even just a moderately OK amount of action.

Gillison found that the new rise in oral cancer occurs predominately among young, white men, but it is not clear why. A study that looks at the number of men versus women who like to go downstairs is called for to help clarify this mystery.

Perhaps the most interesting aspect of this new information is the concern over teens and their apparent love for oral sex – something which I was not aware of. “It’s news that might alarm some parents, who worry about adolescents’ appetite for oral sex,” CBS News reported.

According to research done by Bonnie Halpern-Felsher, who also presented at the AAAS conference, teens perceive oral sex to entail less social, emotional, and health risks than actually doing it. At the same time, however, teens who only engaged in oral sex reported fewer perks, “including pleasure or feeling good about themselves” compared to those who actually seal the deal. This might be because restricting yourself to oral sex is like going to a restaurant and only ordering a small (but hopefully tasty) appetizer. It goes to show that our attitudes about sex are often convoluted and contradictory – especially when we are teenagers.

So teens are going down on each other, and it might be called a public health problem. (But I can’t really relate to that, because I wasn’t doing any of those things in High School. I think that should have been seen as a public problem, because the public could have helped out). It is something that should be part of health education, but blow jays and muff diving are topics gym teachers feel awkward talking about, so it probably will not happen. TC mark

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  • atcolv

    Shit.

  • http://twitter.com/straponheart Evan Hatch

    i'll stop sucking dick when you take it from my cold, dead, cancer infested mouth

    • Nan

      omglol

  • IndianGiver

    blow jays and muff diving.

  • blow j.robbins

    theres no way im suiting up for bjs now

    • http://twitter.com/rislynsey christopher lynsey

      Look what you have Dan, look what you have done

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Carlos-Ortiz/1279921705 Carlos Ortiz

    I'm glad I:
    1.- Haven't gotten a “moderately OK” amount of action in my lifetime
    2.- Got that 'stupid' HPV vaccine for men

  • PERFECTCIRCLES

    How could you not have heard about teens now predilection towards oral sex? There was a Lifetime movie called “She's Too Young” all about that, not to mention several episodes of Degrassi.

    Everyone please get the vaccine.

    • Audrey

      we watched “she's too young” in my high school health class… it really resonated with me

  • http://brianburke.tumblr.com/ brian burke

    i like this article, but i'm left wondering if thought catalog has some sort of policy about using the turn of phrase 'blow jay'?

    it makes me feel pretty uncomfortable.

    • Nan

      lol blow jays a cool phrase

  • EmiliaBedelia

    I refuse to believe this.

  • ALIKAT

    Smoke 'em if you got 'em!

  • DSTRYA

    can we please not start publicizing this, fwding to other folks etc? BlowJays are rare enough round these parts

  • Pinto

    Though this was indeed presented at a medical association conference, I'm apt to believe that the correlation between number of partners and development of oral cancer does NOT necessarily imply causation. If you think about it, it's likely that many of these people who happen to develop oral cancer also “happen” to be smokers- caring little for their health both sexually and otherwise.

    Don't assume something like this to be fact when no other trends are even posited: research can “show” you anything.

  • Angela

    As if having HPV caused cervical cancer didn't make you feel like a dirty slut, now you have oral cancer to make you feel like a dirty cock-cocking whore. The shame! I guess my mom was right.

    And am i the only one freaking out that 6 partners is EXTREMELY low….and I have quit smoking 3 times. Damn you and your poison dick (stick).

  • Nic

    Yet didn't they also find a link in another study that for women, performing oral sex on a male partner and swallowing reduces risks for breast cancer and pregnancy related difficulties?

    I'd imagine the percentage of men who experience higher amounts of oral cancer is related to the higher rates of HPV among women – it's a typically symptomless condition that can often clear on it's own, and is usually only identified through PAP tests – and a HUGE percentage of women have it or have had it at some point. Make sure your next meal is on Gardasil, fellas ;)

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