I Won’t Let You Define Who I Am

I find myself looking in the mirror… a stranger stares back at me. 

I gave up everything for you. I wore my hair differently, I wore clothes that clung to me like a second skin. I treated my face like a canvas and painted layer upon layer of makeup on my gentle skin.

I let you treat my body as if was disposable and not like the precious monument that I have always viewed it to be. Your hands devoured my curves as if they were yours to claim. You acted as if you had branded my shell as yours.

But that was just it… my body was the only part of me you were interested in. You lured my mind and soul into a dark spiral. Filled with temptations I had said no to countless times before.

You didn’t care for my heart or my soul. 

You weren’t interested in deciphering the secret code of my heart or slowly unwrapping my soul. You had no interest in treating me with care and delicate touch.

Do you even really care for who I am?

To be quite honest… I no longer care. I deserve so much better than to have you define who I am. I won’t change my loveable quirks or dress more generic to suit your fancy.

I am not the kind of girl who can do casual and you know what? I am completely fine with that. I cannot be loved with half a heart and all I want is to be loved. I do not want someone to touch me on my surface but rather reach far deeper and grab my heart and soul… you don’t deserve to know my inner workings.

I will wear my heart on my sleeve and my bumblebee tights with pride. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Andrea Sachs in training.

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