Many of my articles have been about self-love, romance and the struggles of life. But not once have I ever written about the deepest, most intimate workings of my mind and heart. Yes; I have struggled through my life and pain is the easiest aspect to write about- with pain comes passion. But it’s not just with love and pain that passion is created. Through the struggles of my mental health, the death of someone I loved dearly and all the suffering I have watched loved one’s experience- I lost my faith. I turned my back on God because “How can God exist, if there is so much suffering?”
When my life started to turn around I realized that, so many people had done what I had done. When people experience great trauma or loss, they automatically assume that there is no God because how could he let this happen? No, he never let anything happen- we strayed from his plan. I firmly believe in the saying “everything happens for a reason” and God has a plan that we may not always see.
Yes, I was so angry! How could he let her leave? How could he let my mother go through so much pain? And how could he let his children suffer from discrimination? But no- I was looking at life from the wrong perspective. God gives us what we can handle at the exact moment that we need to handle it. Every decision He makes has a purpose, a purpose that may not be clear at first.
I know now, that I struggled to become a powerful and independent individual- that what I went through had a greater purpose. And I am thankful for all that I have experienced in my life… I’m thankful for Him, in my life.