How Can We Stay Single Until We Meet ‘The Right Person’ If We Don’t Know Who That Is?

Couple sitting on a rocky mountain looking at each other as sunset colors the sky
Cody Black / Unsplash

As much as I appreciate all the people who stand by the belief that “we should stay single until we meet the one,” how are we truly supposed to know who “the one” is if we don’t kiss a list of frogs first?

We learn from our past choices and mistakes. These choices not only mold us into who we are, but also show us what we need and want from life. How else are we supposed to know that we are free spirited in relationships and need a partner that will give us space, or we are easily attached to people and need a life partner?

Sometimes we also need to get into a relationship with someone to see their true colors- how else can we know whether or not the person is right for us? On a realistic note, as much as the idea of staying single our whole lives until miraculously at age 23 we meet our soulmates seems ideal…we are humans. We demand affection. Yes maybe some males are more than happy to be non-committed but females are emotional creatures; we need love to survive.

Heartbreaks are bound to happen; they teach us lessons and allow us to distinguish what we deserve. Being with the wrong people, as much as it may hurt, allows us to appreciate the right people so much more.

So respectfully to those who have the notion that we will remain single until we meet our perfect match…I apologize, that doesn’t really seem realistic at all.

Now don’t get me wrong: I am not hating on anyone. But if we consider romance from another point of view…unfortunately life isn’t always like Moulin Rouge where we lay eyes on someone and know in our hearts that, That is our person. We cannot all have the high school sweethearts experience and not every romance is this big great love that can overcome anything; this isn’t Everything Everything.

Here is the greatest advice I can give to you. If you want to get into a relationship, do it. Learn from it. If they break your heart, learn from what went wrong and do better in the next one. Learn what you like and learn what best suits you. Fall in love over and over again until one day you fall in love with the person every day and their flaws don’t bother you.

And remember, love is never the same. Every person you share a love with will be different from the last so no I cannot tell you how you will know that the person you are with is your soulmate. You may not fit together like puzzle pieces or fall in love at first sight. It may be the partner that makes you believe in yourself or brings your walls down.

At the end of the day the right person for you is the person who always stays. TC mark

Andrea Sachs in training.

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