So yesterday I woke up being finger raped. What’s that all about?
This isn’t the first time it’s happened, either. Sometimes the fingers are fully inserted, sometimes they are lingering around my clit. But either way, guys, if my eyes are shut and I’m asleep (be it pretending or not), then I ain’t interested.
As far as I’m concerned my lady parts are mine. I’m more than happy to lend them out and share, however under my knowledge please. If I’m very clearly asleep, or even just hazy-tired, then it really isn’t all right to take it upon yourself to try and find room for one more in my undies. It takes me a few seconds on a good day to gain my bearings when I wake up, let alone to find a boy pawing away, slightly scratching and jabbing at my privates. Especially if we have had sex the night before and I’m still tender as prime steak.
If you fancy some early morning finger fun, then first off make sure I’m awake (hey, might as well check my pulse while you’re at it), go brush your teeth, cut your fingernails, and then feel free to woo me. But if you are doing naughties to someone without their awareness and consent, you are looking at nothing but a vagina drier than the Sahara and a potential lawsuit.