1. “Did your piercing hurt?” My god if we had a pound for every time we’d heard that we could probably sort out the recession in a couple of days. We allowed someone to penetrate our skin with a sharp sterilised needle and now we keep that hole open with a piece of metal. Is this enough of a drescription? Do you want us to tell you we cried like a lil bitch? Do you want us to say we enjoyed it?
2. “Nice ink! Can I touch it” No. Stop touching us. If the tattoo is done well you wouldn’t be able to feel a difference in the skin anyway so do. Not. Touch. Us. It’s invasive and above all it’s irritating. At times we’re lucky if we even get asked before people touch us up to “see” our tattoos. Respect our space.
3. “I’ve always wanted a tattoo, where’s the least painful place to get done?” We don’t know, because everyone is different and everyone responds to the pain differently.
4. “I had a few coloured streaks in my hair when I was a teen!” Did you, aye? We love your efforts to appear relatable. But combined with common backhanded compliments like “But I think coloured hair looks bad,” or “It was just silly and I grew out of it,” you’re failing.
5. “So do you like, love Satan and stuff?” This one is reserved only for the spectacular breeds of idiots. Our style or lifestyle as alt women doesn’t correlate with any religions.
6. “Halloween already, is it?” See the response above.
7. “Personally, I don’t like wearing that much makeup.” Well when your face belongs to us,
which it never will, we will never question that. So don’t question what’s on our faces.
8. “All those piercings! But you’re so pretty!” What is pretty and not pretty is subjective and differs between people. We also don’t give a flying fuck what you think is pretty. We think we’re pretty.
9. “Have you tried wearing some colour?” For what? Have you tried keeping your mouth shut?
10. “And do guys actually like this sort of thing, or?” Oh yeah, sorry. We forgot we did this for guys. Better get to Topshop ‘n get some pastels stat before we die alone.
11. “I bet you’re like, really kinky in bed.” No, actually we all prefer missionary with the lights off with minimal eye contact. That’s only on special occasions by the way. Maybe on your birthday will we push the single beds together.
12. “Do you have a job, looking like that?” …Sorry, to busy eye rolling ourselves back into the 90s when people used to give a fuck about that sort of thing. See the fashion industry or say, any creative industry to see all the alt people.
13. “Are you a Suicide Girl?” Um, well some of us are. If you’re into it then gurrrrrl go for it! We might be, we might not be – who knows!
14. “You must have daddy issues for sure.” Oops, sorry that our appearance has threatened you to a point you need to rationalise our self-expression somehow.
15. “I had a phase like that once.” Cool. That’s fine. But for some of us it’s a lifestyle, and it sticks around for a while.
16. “Do you really think you’re unique?” How do people come up with this shit based on looking at us for a few minutes. Where did you get that narrative from? Where do you get this shit?
17. “Are you depressed?” Depression is pretty serious. It manifests itself in many ways. Maybe for some people it might show through dark clothing – but don’t make assumptions. Just be understanding and thoughtful.