It’s not a bad thing to be single. I really do believe that. I think it is important to take time in between lovers to reshape your vision of what you want and to discover more about yourself.
I’ve learned more about myself in the past couple of years of singledom than I care to admit. And the two years before that, in between my long-distance casual hookup turned short-lived relationship and the months-long blissful love affair resulting from a hopeful dating app binge. And after my first serious heartbreak following a two-year romance, spending just as long after rebounding with guys that didn’t get past the second date.
These were not bad relationships. In fact, I was in love with most of the guys. That’s why it took me so long to open my heart up to someone again.
But I guess you could say I’ve gotten used to being single. I’ve gotten used to attending family parties solo and being the third wheel with my friends and their significant others because it beats the alternative of staying home alone. I’ve adapted to my lifestyle of cooking for one and not having to coordinate with someone else’s plans before accepting an invitation. Late night phone calls and daily check-ins turned into restful nights’ sleep and productive days doing things that I always put off when I had a boyfriend in the mix. I’ve been able to take advantage of brunch dates with my girlfriends and spontaneous weekend getaways because the only calendar I have to sync with is my own. While this wasn’t an easy transition fresh off of heartbreak, it became a new norm for me, and I’m okay with that.
I’ll eventually find love again, but for now I’m enjoying the freedom that single life brings.