Don’t be afraid of us. Women in their thirties and beyond are way ahead of the curve. Watching Sex and the City at sixteen, it didn’t totally register that Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte, and Samantha were thirty plus. The show was quite revolutionary in that sense. And yet twenty years later it’s still relevant. Dating is just as hard and Manolo’s are even more expensive. But if that show taught us anything it’s that your girlfriends are your first soulmates, it takes a really long time to find the one, and you’re going to make a million mistakes along the way. However, with age comes growth and we evolve into the people we fought to become. There is no woman more badass than a single woman over thirty. Here’s why:
1. We’ve got our shit together
That’s right. Read that again and let it sink in. We spent our twenties figuring out what we wanted out of life, our careers, and bar hopping on weekends. And truth be told, we have no freaking clue where people go out these days. We worked on ourselves and know our worth and what we deserve. We’ve made it this far; we sure as hell don’t plan on settling. Furthermore, we’re incredibly self-sufficient. We pay our taxes and all of our bills. Okay, maybe not all of our bills, a family phone plan never hurt anyone. Bottom line, we take care of ourselves. We don’t necessarily need you, we CHOOSE you—there’s a difference.
2. We don’t put up with BS
We have zero tolerance for disrespect. We graduated from our frat boy days. We’re confident AF. We’re not thirsty; we’re hungry for something real and honest. We’re not going to beg you to stay. If you want to leave, go. We’ll find better because we spent nearly a decade weeding guys like you out anyways. Don’t expect us to chase after you either. I only run when my trainer forces me to, or toward a Barney’s shoe sale. Also, we don’t have time to play games. The whole, “Should I text him? Will he text me?” is played out. If we want to communicate with you, that means we’re interested. If we don’t, we won’t.
3. Yes, our clocks are ticking
David Bowie’s song “Under Pressure” is literally our anthem and we can’t help but recite Marisa Tomei’s speech from My Cousin Vinny. Please don’t remind us what we already know and have been programmed since birth that our job is to procreate. If we do decide we want to have children, guess what—thanks to technology, we’ve got options. And if it’s not our inner voice or gynecologist, then it’s most definitely our mother nudging us to freeze our eggs. However, we don’t need to scramble yet—a former model just gave birth at 54, so let’s all rejoice.
4. We did the groundwork
We were set up, endured the asshole phase, and have at least one deadbeat ex. Some of us might have even dated a psychopath. Been there, and guaranteed we’ve probably done it. We’re experienced. We are veteran daters at this juncture. If you don’t have what we’re looking for, we know better than to try to change or mold you into what we want. You’re not clay. We’ve acquired a great deal of knowledge. We are navigating the dating apps, too, because apparently nobody meets organically anymore. And a “meet-cute” only exists in Nancy Meyers movies. If only she could write my love story. #itscomplicated
5. We will love you with everything we have
We know how difficult it is to meet someone. When we do find you and decide you’re our person, you may be overwhelmed with our love. We’re fiercely loyal. We will fight tooth and nail to make our relationship work. And be entirely grateful every step of the way, even on the bad days, because we’re not fools either. We know it’s not all diamonds and rosé. (#pumprules. Lisa and Ken are relationship goals.) But the wait is finally over. We don’t have to get dressed for another first date. It sounds magical already. We can stop swiping and start living out our future together.
Ladies in this age bracket are hopeful—that much I can promise you. There’s something to be said for dating a woman who knows what she wants and won’t stop until she gets it. She’s a force of nature. Get in front of her or get out of her way. This girl is on fire!