I will never know if you are aware of this but, you revived me. In a time when I was drowning, you provided air. In a time when all I needed was love, you saw my heart on my sleeve and you shared yours in return. You reminded me there are things to look forward to. Maybe our story did not last as long as it should have, but maybe it did. You were a chapter in my book and I in yours.
I am learning to let go gracefully of things not meant for me, and that includes you. I am learning to let go of memories, moments, what ifs and flashbacks to specific places we traveled together to, whether that be physically or soulfully. I will never forget you. It sounds very cliche, but it’s true. Our chapter may have not ended as gracefully as we should have let it; however, when I think of you, all that remains is gratitude.
We only get one life, one chance, one story. Yet sometimes we are not on the same page at the same time. Sometimes the chapter we shared reads differently on each end, and maybe one of us signified something different to the other. There are all these unanswered questions that eventually direct us back to only what we know. I know you cared. I know you understood me. I know you are genuine and had only the best intentions. I know in the end you did what was right for you. I know you loved me. With all of that I apologize, because I got greedy. I wanted more. I wanted answers you could never give. I wanted a relationship you could never offer because of limitations you made me aware of.
You sparked my soul. If you hold onto anything from our chapter, hold onto that. In a time where there was mostly darkness and little hope, you generated humor, confidence and light. I was able to begin again.
How do you say goodbye to someone that you will never forget? I know the memories, moments, what ifs and flashbacks will eventually visit less often and the emotions that accompany won’t hit as hard. The questions will disappear and what I know won’t hold much influence anymore, but how you made me feel will never change. I hope the same for you.