The fear of being alone and loneliness can cause us to think that a relationship will fix all of our problems. It might feel that way at first, but as time passes you will begin to realize you are still unhappy.
Being comfortable and confident in yourself will allow you to better understand what it is you need, as well as what you’re looking for out of life.
This could be your career, relationships, health, finances, education, etc. It’s your choice–really–it’s something that can only be found within you.
Once you’ve determined what you need and what you don’t need, you will start to figure out which men you can’t take seriously. Especially, if a committed relationship is what you are looking for .
1. The emotionally unavailable
If they are just getting out of a serious relationship they are likely not ready to jump into another relationship. He is usually processing a lot of feelings and will be emotionally drained. You may also notice this behavior in a man that just lost his job. Knowing that he has a purpose and has the ability to provide will be priority, so he will want to focus on getting his life in order. He will be distracted and unable to focus on anything other than his current situation.
This makes it difficult for a healthy relationship to develop. Time heals all. Give him space to process and figure out what’s next. If his situation changes and you both are still interested–go for it.
2. Not looking for anything serious
If a guy tells you he isn’t looking for a relationship, you’re pretty much rolling the dice on this one. It’s difficult to know if you should continue to pursue this guy because you enjoy the time you spend together and he seems to be into you. People change their minds, right?
This could get messy. If you find yourself over-analyzing all his text messages and trying to decipher the things he does or doesn’t do, it might be time to rethink your options. It’s likely he is a commitment-phobe and it’s best to move on.
3. He is more into you than you’re into him
There is no question that this guy is interested in you. He is really good about texting you back (maybe too much). He makes an effort to see you and asks you how your day is going. But…there is something about him that just doesn’t click.
This can be an internal dilemma. Why is it that you’re not into this guy? Sigh. If there is just no chemistry, break it to him easy and wish him luck.
4. He’s just not into you
So you think you finally met someone and things are going well. You hang out a couple times and start to really see some potential. Then things start to shift, you stop hearing from him as often and he begins to flake on plans. This is when you start asking yourself questions. What happened? Was it something I said? Did I do something wrong?
This guy almost never gives you an explanation, but here it is. He isn’t interested. Men make their intentions known. If they want to spend time with you, they will make time for you. Delete him from your contacts and keep it moving.
5. Wait for the one that feels right
If you find that you’re over-thinking a potential relationship, it’s probably not for you. Relationships require work and sacrifice, so be sure you’re investing your time and energy in someone you can see yourself with long term. You’ll know if the person is right for you, if you’ve taken the time to figure out what it is you want.