When You Love Someone More

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You’d think that when you willingly put in that amount of effort and time for someone, you’d get back the same kind of treatment. You expect that much from him because you know that you are willing to do the same. If not, more.

You could never foresee the days where you’d get to spend your time with him and him alone. There would always be last minute changes, cancellations, or an overlap of plans. It felt as though you weren’t important enough for him to want to plan something with you on his own initiative. Gone were the days where you’d used to flare up about not spending enough time with him. You’re sick of fighting over the same issue, and the fights lead to nowhere. He’s not willing to make the sacrifices for you and you can’t and couldn’t make him do so.

You’re the one who loves more, and the one who loves more, loses. You get your heart broken over and over again by the same person who has that same ability to fix it. How can one person have the ability to destroy you, but at the same time, make you feel as though you are the luckiest girl in the world?

How could someone have the heart to watch you cry and pour your heart out to him, and while he apologises and promises to make the time for you, goes behind your back to schedule appointments and plans that do not involve you?

When the day comes that you think you’ve finally managed to get him to spend some time with you, he arrives late, blames it on external factors, and spends the rest of the time focused on his phone while you sit in silence, pathetically cherishing every minute together.

It’s not easy to love someone who never has time for you. You’re always going to feel second place next to everything, and you’re going to blame yourself for not being good enough.

Pack your things and leave, because for every minute that he chooses not to spend with you, someone else will. And that someone is going to appreciate you, and make the time for you because you are enough.