1. Who are those teenagers laughing at? Me, probably. Yep, it’s definitely me that they’re laughing at, so the real question is what did I do wrong?
2. Do all my friends secretly hate me, and are they hanging out without me, right this very second?
3. I kind of want to take this photo but I’m in public and there’s nothing more awkward than someone watching you take a selfie.
4. Why isn’t anyone giving me a compliment on my new outfit?
5. WHY HASN’T MY SOCIAL MEDIA POST GOTTEN ANY LIKES? Is it only worth sharing to me? Should I delete it? Would people notice if I did erase it, and find that even lamer than the post itself?
6. Someone gave me a compliment on my outfit. Was that genuine or were they being facetious?
7. Is this person doing noisy things and drawing attention just admirably confident or am I right for feeling secondhand embarrassment on their behalf?
8. Does this person have a staring problem or is their lingering glare an indication that I have something tragically wrong with my physical appearance.
9. I wonder if people still remember that slightly embarrassing, but pretty insignificant thing I did 10+ years ago?
10. Should I attend this social gathering that I wasn’t personally invited to? Sure, my friends are going and the host is an acquaintance, but it’s always odd going to something without a call, text, or official invitation.
11. Is this tweet/Facebook status/Instagram post about me? Should I like it so that if it’s a subtle shot at me, they’ll know that I know?
12. I feel like the way that I’m standing is awkward, what should I do with my arms?
13. What if other people can hear my thoughts and they know all about the craziness that’s constantly going on in my head? Hmm, if you’re currently listening to this thought, I’m on to you, pal.
14. Am I severely self-conscious or am I actually a narcissist who thinks everyone’s world revolves around ‘em?