1. They treat a waitress poorly.
2. General rule: if they trash talk and gossip about other people, they are doing the same thing to when you’re not around.
3. If they hurt someone’s feelings, they defend themselves by saying “I’m just being honest” or worse, “do you want me to lie?”
4. You’ve seen them argue with someone they love (a parent, child, or significant other) in which they say something that shows a total lack of respect for that person and the relationship they’ve built with them. It may be the heat of the moment, but good people fight to solve problems, not to make the other person feel like the bad guy.
5. They’re obsessed with “new” people. Every 4 months they become obsessed with a new friend or love interest and their long term friends take a backseat.
6. They accuse people of “bullying” them and they are no longer in school.
7. They often utter sentences that begin “Let’s invite X because they will Y”–buy us drinks, drive us around, get us in for free, etc. Someone who is comfortable enough to casually mention they are only friends with certain people for the perks are just gross inside.
8. At any point they become a Debbie Downer. For instance, they tell a story about striking out with someone in their love life and they say “this always happens to me” or “I always have the worst luck.” It might seem like they are just currently down on their luck but this kind of negativity is manipulative of the other people in their lives, they are looking for constant reassurance, which is unhealthy.
9. You’ve witnessed them taking advantage of a drunk person.
10. They cheat on their significant other. They may make a compelling case and justify it in all sorts of ways, but a good person fixes a relationship or moves on.
11. “I hate drama.”
12. They act like a completely different person depending on who they are hanging out with. Different people bring out different aspects of each person’s personality, but no one should change dramatically.
13. They are extremely grossed out by regular human phenomena like body hair. If they’re so out of touch with reality that just being reminded of their humanity makes them so uncomfortable, they aren’t likely to be rational about other realities either.
14. Your dog hates them (and they usually are people friendly).
15. They have no friends they’ve known for longer than a year or two and don’t speak to anyone in their entire family. Cultivating relationships is an essential skill and when no one in your life can stick around longer than a few months, chances are the common denominator is the problem.
16. Anytime someone disagrees with them they make straw person caricatures of the other person’s argument in order to shoot them down. They cannot and will not perceive of valid reasons why someone might not take the same view as them.
17. Alternatively, when they disagree with someone, they call them “crazy.”
18. All their exes are “obsessed” with them still. Or, they still harbor vitriolic hate for people they haven’t seen or spoken to in years.
19. They say something along the lines of “I’m real” a lot. Normal people don’t hang around with fake people, so they wouldn’t feel the need to specify.